So I met up with the girl I sarged last Friday. I figured this would essentially be our comfort stage. It would have been C2 and C3, in Mystery's model.

I went out last night and got shit wasted, so I felt fucking rough today. Definitely not the best state to be going on a date.

Its a shame, since I think if I had been in a good state I could have made it work. Instead I got had by shyness, awkwardness and difficulty thinking how to make conversation.

Basically, I met up with her in town. Things were going ok, until I decided to get something to eat. My stomach did a smart about-turn, and I thought "OMG I'm gonna puke"! Conversation died at this point, and I reckon by now she thought I was pretty weird.

I took her back to my place, and kept trying to keep things flowing. It didnt happen; we ended up playing some sort of sick game of twenty questions and interrogation, and there was no chemistry at all. I felt too awkward by now to steer the interaction towards some sort of escalation.

Tried to bust through the awkwardness with some physical contact, so I kissed her a bit. She was awkward too by now, so this just sort of sealed the deal.

Things just died from there. I walked her back to her car, and she left. I am pretty sure the attraction I created when I met her has completely gone now. I'm pretty sure if I tried to rekindle things I would get LJBFd straightaway.

Do you guys think there is any chance of rebuilding this attraction? Or should I just forget her or LJBF her?

I think the reason why things died are my awkwardness and shyness. My inner state, and therefore my game, was rubbish. I think the reason why she was attracted to me in the approach was my comparative extroversion, and decent use of routines. With no material to use as a crutch in the comfort stage, I was helpless. I also think that I only had the confidence to approach her because of crutching on alcohol.

I might add that I am not upset about this. She was dead easy to pick up, and the whole thing has been a learning experience that has highlighted many of my weaknesses.

Morals of the story as far as I am concerned are:

-Don't go on a date hung over.
-I need to beat shyness in one on one situations
-I need to learn a lot more material
-I need to not RELY on this material
-I need to not use alcohol as a confidence crutch. It means that when I meet girls sober, I am no longer confident enough to escalate, and therefore am not congruent with the version of me they were attracted to.

Hey man,

Been there, I know how you feel. The only way to get comfortable with these sorts of situations is to expose yourself to them more and more, quite simply... practice.

'-I need to learn a lot more material
-I need to not RELY on this material'

That doesn't make sense.

The only thing you need to overcome is your shyness, if like me you are naturally introverted then experience in these sorts of situations is the key. However, if you are naturally quite shy, don't feel you have to force being extrovert, that is incongruent to who you are, if you are comfortable with your introvert nature then other people will be ok with this rather than feeling awkward.

Awkwardness only arises when people sense you are not comfortable in a given situation. If you are a man of few words then fine, you can instead communicate alot of things through your body language alone. If you are comfortable behaving like this, chances are she will be comfortable around you. Don't try to over-compensate by using routines or made-up stories as somewhere down the line you will be exposed as a fraud.

Besides it's rare you'll hear a girl say 'Introverts are sooo unattractive'.

Just be comfortable with your natural persona.

I'd of thought that'd scare them away. Teehee

Move on and put this down to experience. You should be in this game in order to give yourself the choice you deserve. Move forward.

You’re making progress as you have identified the issues with using ‘material’.

Now you are able to work on this.

Again I agree with nova, you never fail in the game, you only learn

Whack - as I've already said - Gaming when your pissed isn't the best idea but it is definately all about the learning! The fact that you're out there and doing it means your progressing. I wouldn't call taking a strange girl home and K-Closing her a fail! Don't be too hard on yourself bud - just keep on the road and you'll get there

The title reminds me of the crystal maze.

I think you could try again if you want but don't put her on a pedestal, remember you have so many options because there are so many women in the world.

Oddly, the girl texted me later saying she hopes she didnt bore me too much. She says she would like to see me again.

I think she is shy as well. Perhaps she blames herself for the stale interaction, or feels like she needs my approval. I'm not sure what to do about this. Either way I am positive I have lost the attraction I built with her, so even if I see her again I would have to recreate it.

I think I will see her again, but I'm not going to chase her or waste excess energy on her. It will be much easier to start fresh with someone new.

But yeah, definitely need to bust my shyness. I think practicing gaming without alcohol is the way to go about this. If I can get used to gaming without any crutches, it will all be a lot more natural, and hopefully I will learn quicker.

Perhaps try some Day Game or gaming in a cafe setting etc. That way nobody is drunk.

I've never been a subscriber to an alcohol ban when out 'gaming'. If you enjoy a drink whilst out socialising in the evenings then do so, alcohol only becomes a crutch when you get so shit-faced that you think its gives you so-called 'dutch courage'.

2-3 drinks is not going to dramatically alter your state perhaps only to serve you in feeling a little more relaxed. I remember Kowalski once saying that alcohol 'is king' in this country, it's part of the make-up of our social custom.

Go out, have fun, be normal, have a couple of drinks, it's all good. Don't feel you need to make sacrifices like that to get better at this. Just be mindful of your alcohol intake that's all, too much and as you know you become a gibbering wreck.

Although having said that, drunk guy meets drunk girl = fun times. I know some guys see this as 'fools mate' But these are gimmies, you'd be a fool to pass them up! I guess it all just depends on what you hope to achieve long-term.