I'd been meaning to come back and check this forum out, and have been putting it off.. Then on friday I scuffed what should have been a golden opportunity, and realised I need to get my head back in this shit.

I was at a busy bar where a bunch of other people I knew were for a friend's birthday. A girl came up to me and asked if we were there for Sam's birthday. We didn't know who he was but apparently this guy was turning 30 and he'd rented out this part of the venue..

Anyway she said it must be my lucky day because her friend thought I was cute, and pointed her out to me. I looked over and I didn't believe her at first, it was probably the most attractive girl in the room - tall, blonde, super elegent etc. And she was looking over at me,

I didn't just go straight over cause she was on the other side of a crowded spot, and i didn't know if she'd put her friend up to it or not. And i wasn't feeling super confident, so was convinced she would lower her estimation of me after we got talking a while. I haven't been gaming for a wile. SO I bided my time a little, went with some friends for a cigarette and met some other people/ girls, flirting a little but more just chatting.

When I eventually got to talk to the original blonde girl a little later in the evening, she had gone cold. Nothing. Not even a hint of interest. The interaction was so flat, and there was nothing i cold say or do that seem to change it. She was unimpressed by anything I said. I had been drinking a few - maybe I was a little tipsy, but not more than anyone else..

Her friends were there, but not the friend who originally approached me. So her friends probably thought i was just a random guy hitting on her. I spoke to them too, showing I was cool and well intentioned etc. But they thought I was young. They were 30 / 31, I'm 27. Anyway I got her number at the end, she said it was 'sweet' of me to ask, and suggested calling.

Only guess what.

It's an invalid number.


It's not impossible to see where I may have screwed up here, but interested to hear your thoughts..

I'm confused: was the girls number you got the girl who approached you, or her friend?

Perhaps you just chalk it up to one of those things, and the fact women can be weird. Sounds like you did nothing wrong, but that you were fighting a losing battle form the start by the sound of her attitude.

Pretty impressive you got her number despite all this, but she may have given you a wrong number just to get rid of you. Women are weird, I'd just shrug it off and move on.

It's the same reason I had to do something and ended up at this forum. I was just relying on the luck of meeting someone. The trouble is it usually happens when you least expect it and in my case I felt ill prepared to act, didn't act, and another chance would pass me by. Though you did take action getting her number which is more than I usually did.

I reasoned that if it's something you're working at all the time to improve on you're less likely to let chances like that slip past you without trying.

Good points - thanks for these. RE Broadsword - yeah it was the same girl whose number I got, only it wasn't a real number.

I certainly could've acted sooner, I guess at the time I was suspicious. I thought, either her friend is exaggerating what this girl actually said, or the girl was just teasing and pointed me out for some attention.

That's hardly an excuse not to go over.. I should have. But I also think it's no coincidence she was so standoffish when I eventually did.

Kind of agree with kowalski you gotta bite the bullet when the interest is there.

+1 to what K said

Girls like confident guys and to feel wanted

Also I might be wrong but the age thing is in your head! 25-30 is the best age to be. You're not too old to make pulling an 18/19yr old creepy but you're not too young to be a child for girls in their early 30s. I might be wrong if you have a baby face but don't think about it because it usually doesn't matter

Fair enough, but her friend made the point that I was young. As if it was an issue. Not much I can say to that other than joke it off.

I always use the old classic 'what is it you find attractive about that?' Cheesy but good.

I always looked young and boyish for my age. For example I was going out with a 28 year old when I was 32 and her friends used to say I was her 'toy boy' as if I were a teenager. It made me realise a lot of women think they are old as they get near 30, especially if they've had kids.

I was going for girls the same age as me when I was in my mid-twenties but they would try to mother me and just thought I was sort of cute. Not sexy and dangerous the way I wanted them to see me. I was shy as well. If I had been more self confident I could have used the way I was more to my advantage.

I read a piece in a newspaper a while ago where the journalist, who had just hit 40 was saying 40 is the new 30 and all that. But he was quite negative, in that he also said "oh, did I mention...once you reach 40 you become invisible to women under 35". I totally disagree with his opinion there.

As you get older, provided you look after yourself, you'll get more attention from women of all ages. When I was 29 I was asked out by a 17 year old at the place I worked. but I turned her down as it did seem too creepy. She was hot so it wasn't easy to do that.

What they are looking for is maturity and confidence and they don't think too much about age except when they start to overthink it and discuss it with their girlfriends, when their social status comes more into the equation.