Little update.
I'm still going out fairly regularly doing day game. I think what I'm addicted too is the feeling I get when I hit on a girl who is early 20's who is attracted to me (It's just not the same with older women). I just think at some basic level she wants to fuck and if we don't fuck my game isn't tight. I'm not fucking many girls in this age group (1 last year). So I'm addicted to improving my game. Since November 2016 I started keeping track of my stats (approaches / numbers / dates). Also writing small comments to myself about things I’m doing which seem positive. I found this useful. I was getting a lot of numbers in November but not much else. So in December I tried harder to be persistent with girls, stop going for numbers when I felt awkward. The net result was 6 dates compared to 1. I also have decided to lie to girls who are early 20’s when they ask my age. They always think I’m late 20’s so I just tell them 32 (I’m 38). 2 of these dates were over christmas (idates). An American (late 20’s). A Thai / Swedish girl (20). The American girl was leaving for Argentina that evening but we had time for a beer. She’ll be back in the UK and had said she wants to meet-up. The Thai-Swedish girl. She was good fun - has a rich daddy so doesn’t work and takes drugs. When she’s back in London we’ll meetup. I’m also doing no-fap. Had no faps since late November. I’m off snowboarding on Saturday, which I’m looking forwards to. One area I need to push myself more into is groups of girls. Once I am more comfortable with this I want to push myself back into going into bars. I like daygame but girls are often busy have shit logistics. I would like to be able to just pull a girl home and fuck her. |
I lost a lifelong best friend last Sunday to a quad biking accident whilst he was on holiday.
He was like another brother to me. I also have a twin brother and we were all very close. It’s the first real loss in my life which has had any meaning. There is some level of irony in his passing. On the Friday I met a chinese girl in the street. She was wearing a skirt and I had noticed a tattoo on her thigh under her tights. (I thought she looked a little slutty). I felt entitled straight away (fucked two asians last year). We spoke and I asked about her tattoo’s and said they were sexy. She was going back to Leeds that night so there was no time for anything in London. The text conversation that evening: Me: So when are you next visiting London? Her: Not sure but I invite you to come to Leeds ;) Me: Tempting do I get to see all 5 tattoos? :) Her Maybe :) Me: In exchange you can listen to my English accent. Her Lol, sounds pretty fair Me: Do you have a sofa I can sleep on? Her: Sure. I live by myself just come down. On Sunday I went to Leeds, she was staying in university accommodation (a dive). Suffice to say she didn’t have a sofa. The sex was good. She reminded me of thai girls and she also had the same name of one of the first thai girls I met with my friend back in 2007. I didn’t find out he has past away until that evening. It was surreal (still is). He would have seen the funny side in it. I’ll miss his sense of humour. I’m thankful I moved to London and pushed myself into difficult situations (A week before the chinese girl there was a cute 24 Romanian girl - I grabbed her hair and asked if she liked it pulled. She was fucking crazy. I kissed her when she said no and she loved it.). I’m not sure what life holds for me but I’ll never forgot my mate and his way of making me laugh and the fortitude he showed in the face of adversity (more than most will ever know). |
It's been a difficult couple of weeks but this is what's happened:
last week (the first week after my friend past), I would randomly start to cry when I realised I would never see him again. I knew I had to accept the pain and face up to it. The last time I saw my friend I was at at the 02 in Wembley in December. Last week I had tickets with my brother to go there again. It would have been too easy to not go. I decided to go and although I found it painful at times I enjoyed it (green day). On the Friday I ran 11k in the rain and cold. I saw another runner talking to a dog owner whilst petting her big dog (edit - how did I make that sound perverted?!). As I ran past the dog ignored the runner and we seemed to track eyes. It was a lovely dog. It made me appreciate the simple things in life. This week has been easier (emotions seem less intense, only cried a couple of times). I've felt I want to reach out and connect with family and people who are not fucktards. I went to my running club on Tuesday and again last night. At one point we were all running (about 10 of us) and some black dude who was walking in front of us started screaming into his phone and pretending we were chasing him (was so funny). I also spend a few days going through photos of us all on holiday (Ireland, Barcelona, Thailand, Egypt & USA). It was difficult but I had a lot of laughs. It also reminded me the best experiences are with other people. All the pictures of nice landscapes and shit just don't compare to photos of when we were having a good time. I was chatting to women in the club (who is cute but married). She seems very outgoing and as leading an adventurous life (moved from Australia, 2 years ago and off travelling again soon). We're going to spend some time together today with other members of the club exploring parts of London. I'm also trying to go to bed on time and sleep properly as this affects my mood. I messaged the Chinese student (from Leeds) and told her I want to see her again and she is keen (I gave her a good seeing too so I wasn't that surprised). Next week I'm off to Miami for a week (holiday). Can't really afford it but paid for the flights and accommodation already, so should be ok. |
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Gotta Love this guy! |
The Chinese student is coming to London on the 28th - we'll fuck lots I expect.
Last week I spoke to a handful of girls. One was 27 year old Latvian with big boobs. We had arranged to meet on Sunday but I was a little lacklustre with my messaging and she flaked. I berated her for it. Later in the evening she messaged asking what I was up to. At that point I knew she wanted to fuck. I told her to get to mine. She did at about 23:00. We went for a beer in a local hotel. I ended up talking quite sexually with her. At one point she was eating the peanuts and said she like salty things. About 10 minutes later I said ‘So you like the taste of sperm or peanuts most?’ Her jaw dropped - but she said sperm. That was the general tone. I told her I was fucking a 23 year old Chinese girl - and we had sex 2 weeks ago. I told her I’m not looking for a relationship - I’m not really looking for anything just to enjoy myself and I am meeting a lot of girls, which is true. She said I was confident so we went back to mine and I fucked her. Felt tired as fuck at work on Monday. |
Well whenever I'm out and I'll be open to hitting on girls. I still seem to find this harder I put it down too just not being present & I'm working on that. Like when I walk home from work, taking my time and not being being in a rush with all the commuters.
I typically go into town quite a lot as I have friends there. So I'll normally plan to meet them for say 8pm but I'll arrive at 7pm and try and hit up a few girls. This is important you don't want to be going out with no end point. I read a book called The Power of Habit, talks about cue, routine, reward. So my cue would be to go out at 7pm, the routine is hitting on girls and the reward is meeting my friends. (Note the reward isn't fucking girls - although of course it can happen). If you don't reward yourself you keep walking around for hours like some guys do that's pretty soul destroying and just plain weird (I'll admit I've done it in the past). I also genuinely believe I have a lot to offer people in general and just like being around people (well some). Showing a genuine interest in girls & also not being a pussy helps. Bold approaches do work on a lot of girls I stop, half of them are literally wetting their panties I swear. |
Yesterday was out enjoying the sun with a friend and doing a little day game at the same time.
I spoke to four girls - nothing of note. As I arrived back in Canary wharf I was going to get some food. The mall there is really quiet at the weekends especially in the evening as most of the shops have closed. This cute little girl walks past me and we have one of those moments where we look are smile at each other. I walk on to the shop. I stop and tell myself WTF am I doing. Will I feel better or worse for proceeding to buy pasta and sauce (and biscuits!) or to turn around and go talk to cute smiley girl. I'll admit this reminded me of what K said. The philosophic mumbo jumbo: Quote:
Much do my disappointment she seemed very interested in me. (If I'm second guessing - I reckon she creamed herself!). She lives close to me so everything just kind of fitted. Took her for a coffee and we arranged to meet Tuesday. I then went to Tesco and got my munchies. After leaving Tesco I saw another cutie. Pretty tall, I thought I had better try again. Long story short, we ended up going for a drink. She was English and pretty sexy. I think maybe I could have taken her home and fucked her that night. My gut feeling is I won't see her again. It was a good day, I do think the 4 girls I spoke too before I arrived back at CW helped me feel more present. Anyway it was fun and fuck kowalski for being a little bit right. |
Interesting that books on my Amazon list. I don't think I reward myself enough. Working on it. I think everyone loves attention. It's about finding those open to receiving it.
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Can't believe it's been so long since my last post.
My house was flooded in June. Took until December to get it all right again. My job was boring as fuck but it kept me living in London another year. I've had the same fb all year and enjoyed copious amounts of sex and perverted things with no strings. She goes back to China in Jan so I'll need to get a replacement. I was in Warsaw with a friend a couple of weeks ago and we did a little day game. We also took took two ukraine girls into a bar. I wasn't really into mine to start with but she grew on me. I've told my current client I'm going to work remotely in Jan for a week so I'll go back. Two good leads there (the other a Polish girl who asked me for coffee after I chatted to her in the shopping centre). The women I'm really into tend to be non-english (it's cuz they all fat, innit! I'm such a dick). Actually I'm getting a bit tired of London and really like Warsaw so I'm beginning to think maybe I should sell up and move there. (Actions express priorities so watch this space). For the time being working remotely, more could be pretty sweet. |
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