Originally Posted by YossarianLives

Evening,

I've been pondering some recent meet-ups from dating apps (OKCupid / Tinder) and invite your comments - tell me where I'm going wrong, where to sharpen up!

Background:
- Just left a 3 year relationship
- Used to be active in pick-up
- Interested in getting a new girlfriend, more interested in sleeping with hot girls!
- Reasonable looking, in good shape but my major points are intelligence, confidence, rapport (modesty too but I'm trying to build a picture so don't think too bad of me!) but feeling a bit out-of-practice in seducing

Apps:
- I've been using OKCupid and Tinder
- Never convinced I'm putting the best photo on as the main one but still getting matches
- OKCupid seems like a deeper rapport app where girls are more interested in a relationship
- Tinder - way hotter girls, tonnes of them, probably lower hit rate though...

The Weekend:
- Saturday - OKC meet-up
- Sunday - Tinder meet-up
- OKC - the girl was not that good looking, maybe a 5, but was available at a good time and... seemed like a bit of sweetheart, to be fair! (Should I feel guilty? Ha!). I felt I needed the practice. Good rapport, no awkward moments, good connection. But... no sexual chemistry. Hard to see how to progress. She seemed a (chatty) introvert and a tad reserved so it was probably an up-hill battle. Kino difficult as she seemed to automatically (and almost deferentially) keep a polite distance.
- Tinder - hotter girl, not fantastic but adventurous and sporty. 7, so not great but it's early days. Again, comfortable, good rapport. This time more energy as she was more extroverted and I was more aware of my weakness. Physical distance was closer, easy to kino comfortably (but not reciprocated). This one involved alcohol too which I thought might help! All the same, as much as we got on, I just saw no opportunity to push seduction and sexuality.

Things on my mind:
- If girls very quickly feel comfortable, happy, chatty, etc. how do you push it on into flirting if its not happening naturally?
- Were they too comfortable? Should I be doing that old breaking rapport thing? Am I making them so at ease that they assume we're at the same status rather than making them chase me?
- As opposed to meeting at a bar (for example) do online-to-date scenarios lack the connection and intimacy? Should I be going in with a different mindset or maybe framing the date differently (i.e. we're not just meeting up, you're about to find out if we're destined to have sex or not, etc.)?
- Is DHV really that important? Is it too unnatural?
- Rapport, confidence, general calibration all seemed solid but it's pushing it to the next level that seems to allude me!

Appreciate your thoughts. A lot there but it's my first time back in the game.