Last week, something unexpected happened that has caused me to step back and take a look at my situation. I am a teacher, and have has the same tutor group for the last 4 years. Last week, they went on study leave for their exams (they are in Year 11). I wasn't expecting anything, so I was surprised when they presented me with a large world map (I teach Geography) which the majority of them had signed. This reduced me to tears, as they have proved to be hard work over the years!

I was on the verge of leaving but that single moment, along with the other gifts and thanks I have received, has suddenly made all the hard work worth it.

So, how does this relate to PU? Success does not come overnight, there are no short cuts to success (see CovertOperations' last post).

I have not been doing too badly on the bedroom side of things, but at the same time it has been unsatisfactory sex. The kind of sex when, as soon as you cum, there is an immediate feeling of regret. This realisation was reached when, whilst mid-flow with a woman 2 weeks ago, she asked why I was so quiet. I didn't have the heart to say that I wasn't really feeling it.

Sometimes I feel that the women I sleep with is a reflection of how I feel about myself. My last 4 lays have been a random French woman, a 51-year old Northerner, A Spanish prostitute in Valencia, and a 37-year old. The last attractive (in my eyes) woman I slept with (which was 1 year ago) called it a day because, on reflection, of my neediness (position of scarcity).

I was hoping to move out in the summer from my mum's house as I feel this is part of the issue. However having sat down today and done the sums, it will not be financially possible until the New Year at the very earliest.

Rather than look at this as a setback, I now see it as an opportunity to get my head down, save money, hit the gym, meditate, and do other things that will get me prepared to hit the ground running once I get my own place.

As for going out, I plan to go 'dry' for a while to save money. Strangely, I also feel like I have nothing to lose. The only goal I have now when going out is:

Take action.

That is it. Anything else that happens after that is a bonus. So all in all a rather unusual 'field report', but this is where I'm at on my journey.