This realisation that I was being far too dependent on results has ended up being a huge turning point in my game. Everything feels more real now. Having written down thoughts relating to this I have seen how much this affected what I was doing, and who I am. A couple of examples:

Kino. I was touching girls in order to attain a result. Logically this might make sense, you escalate towards the goal of a lay. However I was doing it more out of fear of being friend-zoned. Now, I am conscious that I will do it because it feels good to do so. Self amusement if you will.

Getting the lay. I was pushing and pushing to get logistics just right before, girls could feel this and resisted. Now, I have stopped forcing things, all a sudden I got laid twice over the wkd. The key, I thought to myself, 'if I get laid cool, if not it'll happen sooner or later. This is a tricky mindset if you are desperate to get laid in the first place though.

There are other areas that are affected, and a lot of it is related to ego and fear of rejection. Now I am beginning to identify with this, I can start to really act through my own intentions and not allow the ego to fuck me up.