Trafford Centre. Spot a cute, curvy brunette (aged about 21-22. I'm 33) in [mobile phone shop] as I walk past. We'll call her BR7. Seeing as I've been interested in tablet PCs for a while, I don't even have to feign the interest in the ones they have on display.

BR7: Can I help you?
Tpr: (big smile as I realise it's her come to help me, not one of the geeks) Yes, actually, I've been thinking about getting a tablet PC for a while and I was wondering if you could show me some.
BR7: OK, well the one you're looking at there is quite a good one.
Tpr: I want one that I can actually use as a phone as well. You know, like a really big one. Like Trigger Happy TV. (again, big smile. Going cocky-funny).
BR7: Are you on the TV? You're not Trigger Happy TV are you? That's really funny.
Tpr: Haha! No, I'm not from Trigger Happy TV. Can you see any camera crews? Besides which, this is a face for radio.
BR7: You're on the radio?
Tpr: No, I'm.... oh never mind. It's just an expression.
BR7: So what do you do? [IOI-1]
Tpr: I'm a pilot.
BR7: Oh that's really cool! Who do you fly for?
Tpr: Just a private company! It's not very interesting. I should have told you I was a penguin keeper, that would have been more interesting.
BR7: (laughs) So you're interested in tablet PCs?
Tpr: Yes. Blah blah blah blah blah- Android- blah blah blah
BR7: Blah blah blah- nice screen- blah blah
Tpr: Do you have one?
BR7: Yes I do
Tpr: Which one?
BR7: This one (shows me a different one)
Tpr: I think I prefer that one I was looking at first.
BR7: Well we don't have any of those in stock at the moment- in fact, they're quite old so you might have trouble finding the one that you want.
Tpr: That's no problem, I'll just take a note of it and then look on eBay or something.

I get my phone out to take a picture of the label, rather than writing the model number down. I don't put my phone away.

Tpr: So the one that you've got, does that come with a contract and minutes and texts? Or is it just data?
BR7: Just data, I've got a seperate phone contract
Tpr: You should give me your number and we can go for a drink then (I hand her my phone)
BR7: Hehe! Yes, sure (types her number in). What's your name?
Tpr: Tinpusher. And you are?
BR7: Curvy Brunette 7.
Tpr: Well, Curvy Brunette 7, it's nice to meet you, I'll drop a text later

Couldn't really have gone any better, but it was just practice. I don't intend to go out with her- despite being nice and curvy and brunette (my usual type), her breasts were far too small. Really, for a girl her size (probably a 12-14), she'd have to be FF cup or larger for me to take a second glance.

Made me think though: mobile phone shops. Good places to practice.

FWIW, I looked like a bag of shit. Just got off a long flight, lost my iPod and hadn't shaved for days. Just imagine what could have been if I'd been in a better mood and didn't look like a tramp!!!!