I have this jumper that looks rather christmasy or sumthing youd wear in Scandinavia.
I put this on specifically to go to the shop down the road as i knew HB5 chatty would comment and i couldnt pass an opportunity to get some much needed practice. so on the 5 minute walk i racked my brains for a story, ran thru a couple of ideas knew it would be something to do with Switzerland and a curse the rest id improv...

so when i got there i walked in alpha'd up giving nothing of my body language away acknowledging nobody, i picked up my 3 large rolls for a £1 (bargin) and headed to the four person que. stood there, I was actually really nervous as i knew i was about to blurt out a load of bullshit to somebody i barely knew. The man in front of me was next

AFC: hi there how are you today (blah blah AFC bullshit)
HB5: blahblah

I was next, i turned and looked at her for the first time and said:

Wordsworth: HI
she looks at my jumper, looks up at me, i feel it coming
HB5: Thats a horrible jumper
(whooo, i thought. bit harsh. I actually kinda like it)
Wordsworth: oh really well, it erm actually very um important, i inherited from a aaa erm swiss in on his death dead
at this point i saw the look in her face of "wtf"
Wordsworth: yer this man in the alps....um lost
at this point i got very quiet and self conscious
Wordsworth: yer this was all that was found of him...
I was flailing, so i through in my trump card...composed myself lead in hid my mouth away from the other customers and in a whisper i said: Its cursed...
HB: Really!
she said with surprise and enthusiasm
Wordsworth: No! you freak (big neg, she deserved it after the jumper comment!)
this point i felt a lot more natural and let out a laugh.
i then went on to tell her i bought it from topman after that my game fell to pieces. However i wasnt trying to game her, my aim was to test material and build confidence, which i achieved, even if i freaked her out. if she asks what i was talking about again, i can completely deny the exchange and move on. done. next.

Wordsworth