Hey guys,

You know which ones im talking about,... not the type you can just sort out with 'head and shoulders'.

How do you guys deal with flakes??

So i've been seeing this girl for a few weeks, met up a couple times, things seemed to be going great, after last weekend she hinted she wanted to meet up again. We'd texted during the week with abit of banter and then I told her to come hangout with me this weekend but either way to let me know if she's not up for it so I can reschedule my weekend. That's fair enough I thought, I don't want my weekend to be dictated by the availability of one girl so if she can't or doesn't want to hangout at least let me know. That's common courtesy right?

She doesn't respond.

Now these days, I'm indifferent to game, if a set goes well or bad or if a girl likes me or dislikes me I don't really care i'm just indifferent to it, I don't get that emotional about it. If a girl flakes on me I don't take it personally or get uptight about it like I used to in my classic chump days. However I still can't help but feel a sense of irritation about it. It's a very unattractive trait and it makes me lose respect for that person.

Girls flake for a whole plethora of reasons and it's not worth delving into why they do it. But one thing you can be reasonably clear about is that THEY JUST AREN'T THAT INTO YOU. Fine, I accept that but it would be nice if girls would be upfront and honest about this so you don't have to waste any time.
Many women would find this behaviour unacceptable from a man. Yet so many men are willing to keep chasing a flakey girl and accept this behaviour which just leads to empowering her further and you validating socially lame behaviour. Chances are you are not going to have a fulfilling relationship with a flakey girl.

My stance on flakey behaviour now is zero tolerance. I don't accept it. I don't treat people in that way either personally or professionally and like I said if people are flakey towards me I lose respect for them it does not indicate good or positive character traits. I used to just not respond and cut them out of my life. However by not responding whilst it is rather noble not to react it just reinforces to that person that they're flakey behaviour is acceptable. For a flake no response on your part is the best response for them, indicating that they're behaviour is not being challenged, you accept this behaviour and that you have let them off the hook and that they don't need to take any responsibility for their inconsiderate actions.

If I sense difficulties/issues with a girl straight off the bat I realise it probably ain't gonna get much better so I just nip it in the bud from the start and move on.

This is what I text;

'Hey, sorry xxxxx I gotta be honest I don't take not responding as a 'hint' but as lame second-rate behaviour, not to mention inconsiderate and a waste of my time. All the best x'

Polite and civil yet making my point clear that I don't stand for being treated in that way.

What do you guys think? bit harsh? fair?

I'd be interested to hear how you guys deal with these kinds of situations. Particularly from Adam cuz I think you're game is quite similar to mine, like me you don't stand for any bullshit.

Laters