Mike insulting people and threatening vicious assault isn't going to win you any friends and it definitely isn't going to get you the help you need.
K is intelligent and somebody worth listening to. I trust him because he has nothing to win or lose by calling it how he sees it. Sometimes I find him a little too direct for my sensibilities, but he has sound logic and a point of view worth considering.
Let's look at one of your posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeH0ck
I was extremely "in my head" my whole youth between 2005-2015, hunched over the computer, lights off, on internet forums, burying myself in video games, designing levels for games and basically suppressing my burning desire for female contact. Sometimes I would be masturbating up to 7 times a day. Extremely unhealthy.
.....
During uni and my loneliest days ever between 2011-12 I also got addicted to female autopsy videos as they turned me on more than any porn ever could. Just seeing a naked woman's body being cut up was sheer ecstasy to me for some reason.
Those were my darkest days actually. I'd gone beyond desperation into complete madness. I also worried that I might actually be a paedophile for some crazy reason which was a fear that lasted throughout my whole early 20s.
My self esteem was in the gutter. I couldn't even look people in the face for the fear that they might see the turmoil going on in my head.
Basically only "living" in an unapologetic way since 2016 when I started riding motorcycles.
........
I am particularly interested in girls aged 18-22 as I know this is the age group that I did not take advantage of when I was in it and I won't have long until I will look very suspect indeed for approaching women of that age.
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Just from this thread here you admit to suppressing feelings, self-esteem issues, having a rather strange fetish and a strange penchant for girls who are quite young physically.
That said I applaud your resolve to avoid under age girls despite you having a strange pre-occupation with them.
I agree with K in that you should seek some professional help to overcome anything you have suppressed and repressed and for your own mental health.
Then start from the bottom up - looking at your posts and from your own admission of having Asperger's, you struggle with social queues and norms such as the lady in the shop from your other post.
Make friends and get used to social environments and settings.