Hey Hades

It sounds like you have 2 goals there; developing yourself and getting girls.

I personally found that by focusing on the former, the latter came easier and I was more fulfilled.

There is an author called Mark Manson who has 2 books that I enjoyed although as with all self-help books, take it all with a pinch of salt as after all he is trying to sell a product. His books are:
- Models
- The subtle are of not giving a f*ck

Models deals more with getting girls but there is also a large amount on self-improvement with regards to becoming a more confident, developed and therefore attractive individual.

I can't remember a great deal of The subtle are of not giving a f*ck as I listened to it at work as an audio-book but I liked the idea of choosing the areas of your life to give the limited amount of fucks we have