Thanks to all who posted in this thread, btw.
I'm a little worried about disappointing Stein in case I've not internalised his remarks.
I tried to make sure to focus on free associating and expressing my own opinion. Basically CONTRIBUTING my own thoughts even if they haven't asked me, as was advised by another poster. Was slightly difficult as the 'no talking to strangers please, i'm british', was so bad with these girls that they thought the approach was a dare, but to be honest, i've had worst interactions than that!
Anyway - the short approach from last night:
2 girls sitting outside together.
me: Hey guys, how's your night going?
girls: Errrr....Hi?
me: How's your night going?
girl1: haha....what are you doing? (giggly and kind of confused tone of voice)
me: What do you mean??
girl: You don't even know us! Is this a dare??!!
me: A dare?! Yep! I just made £50 for approaching you! Not bad, eh?
girls: Ha! No, but really. IS it a dare?
me: haha, Of course not! Why would you say that? I just thought you looked cute and wanted to come and meet you
girls: Well that's unusual. You are brave.
me: Well, you're not THAT scary!
girls: I guess
Me: Having a good night?
girls: Not bad
Me: Just not bad? It doesn't sound like you're trying hard enough!
girls: hehe.
me: Who else are you here with?
girls: Just us 2 at the moment but we're meeting a friend in a minute
me: I'm out with a group of guys I play football with. You know....the guys who dared me to come and talk to you
- they're over there, probably watching me!
her: haha - the pressure is on then!
me: I like pressure! So, i'm gonna guess you two are a couple of hairdressers!
Girls: wow. She's training to be one, actually! I'm in sales
me: Shit, i'm good. It was the shiny hair that gave it away! What do you sell?
girl: Technology stuff.
me: Ahhh....you're a nerd. I'm not surprised. I could kinda tell
girl: haha - you should see me when I wear glasses
me: Awww.....you wanna see me again! cute. Maybe...we'll see
girls: haha! You're cheeky!!
me: So how about you? (addressing the other girl) How goes the hair training?
girls: It's Ok
me: Can you cut guys hair? I'm in the market for a new hairdresser.
Girl1: I will be able too at some point! girl2: (looking at her phone) Listen, we have to go now, our friend just text me and she's waiting for us. See you around!
me: Wait. You're kina cool. I think you should give me your number.
girl: Sorry. I've got a boyfriend!
me: Sucks!
- well then, enjoy your night. I'll see you around.
---------
OK, so despite them thinking that it was so odd to approach a stranger that it must be a dare, it went sort of OK. Didn't get teh number or anything, but maybe I just wan't her type? I dunno.
I think that I done slightly better with just talking about my answers to my own questions if that makes sense. (lke when I told her what I was up too even though she didn't ask me.) Free associating was maybe slightly better, but then lots of their answers were just like one word or maybe just a chuckle and so I had tonkeep thinkig of new things to say which as you know is where I struggle!
Getting laid from cold approach in the UK feels like climbing everest, and to be honest, I don't know anyone who can do it. All of my friends who get laid lots do it all through tinder and through social circle/work colleagues.
Not gonna give up, though. If nothing else, it might help me get better at just talking and social skills in general.
I did once get a same night lay from a cold approach in a bar, but in hindsight It was luck and all of the starts aligned that night!!
cheers