Winging
 

Some of my thoughts on winging and meeting guys from Internet Forums to meet girls:

Showing off your skills

This works both ways and in my opinion both should be avoided. I have been guilty of both in the past.

The first is when you’re out and you feel a pressure to show off your skills and show how great you are. Rather than approaching to improve your prospects of getting with gorgeous girls you approach to show your wings that you are a cool little PUA dude who is great with women.

The second is going out hoping to watch some experienced PUAs in action rather than doing it yourself. I know a lot of you new guys will probably have the delusional belief that the more frequent posters are going to show you some magical hokery pokery to get with girls. It’s not like that here. It’s just going to be some cool guys going out having fun and chatting to women. You should be the same.

Getting all nervous

When there is lots of new guys together I sometimes feel this real negative anxiety like I have to be doing stuff. It is not fun and is a one way ticket to terrible state! I can almost see a dark cloud over our heads when it’s like this. I would recommend having fun with each other and don’t get anxious over the fact you’re out ‘picking-up’. However……

Indulging each others AA

I’ve met with random guys off the Internet who I don’t know and just wandered around the street with them for hours on end without approaching. It’s weird enough we are doing this to meet girls, let alone meeting and not actually approaching. That is essentially online dating! Don’t go on gay dates, actually approach and if you’re not make sure you point it out and push each other into it. Do not indulge each others AA by not speaking about it!

Getting out-gamed

I’ve been on nights out where someone is doing pretty well and it completely knocks me back into my head and makes me all insecure. I guess it’s because men are competitive and also if you see someone doing better than you it damages your ego! You should not feel this. Just be happy they are doing well and do your own thing.

Knowing your targets

I was with Foley recently and we brought these girls back to his. (Foley is a regular wing of ours in London, but does not post much here – think he has a life or something?). We didn’t pull them because (amongst other reasons) we didn’t really establish whose was whose and therefore never really got the ball rolling. It was just a big friend fest.

Also, whoever approaches them should have first dibs really and don’t start cracking on to a girl your wing approached (unless of course he is cool with it for whatever reason).

Pointing stuff out

If someone is doing something blatantly wrong point it out. This Friday I was acting needy as hell. Craigus you pointed this out after the event. You should have told me during. Also whilst I was wrapped up in my own stuff I don’t think you and Johnny were approaching much. I should have said you guys should be approaching! That ‘Bounce’ thing we did was cool the other week and if we are having a night where we’re not really approaching we should do this! It’s cool I’ve got proper friends here now, but we’re still meeting to pick up chicks essentially! However…..

Talking about Game

Don’t go on and on about Game with guys when you meet them. It is lame. Action first analyse later.

It can be funny sharing stories about girls (I know I have turned my wing’s ears red with silly stuff I have done), but again don’t try to show off like your some big pimp to cover up the fact your actually being a chode. And don’t be saying things like oh I usually do day game not night game, which is why I’m not doing too well. The only one who gives a shit is you! Plus you should be a cool mofo the whole time, not when the circumstances fit you (hard I know, but you should).

Meerkatting

Don’t be looking around like a meerkat for girls. People can see it a mile off. Again just have fun with your wings and if you see a girl you like go for it.

Wingman Section

Finally if you’re a key board jockey sitting there reading this and still not going out - go to the Wingman section now and do something with your life!

Loving the "Bounce 4 Life" sig SE baby!

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I find I perform well when out with lads from the forum. When alone my state tends to drop and I chode around knowing I should be approaching and getting into my high energy imprint/persona, but just mope around like an east African tree sloth on morphine, which is to say not do much at all.

When I am with a friend who knows about the community and wants to see me "in action", I go into sloth mode again. Attached to the outcome and not wanting him to form a negative opinion of me, I find I'd rather just fluff talk about the game and not actually do anything. Then again when I'm out with someone and they "challenge" me to show them what I can do, poof(!) that high energy party dude is back.

With the forum lads, failure doesn't matter. Everyone knows the score and is putting in effort, getting rejected, getting in-set and we're all part of the same party. Bottom line, if there are wings from the forum about, my game improves.

A lot of it has to do with my ego as well. Well all of it has to do with my ego :)

Could be showing off. Could be not wanting to appear weak. Whatever it is, I am glad I've got it as it transforms me into the monster you usually meet on weekend nights :D

Edit: Of course I do realise ideally this shouldn't be the case and my state should depend on my desire on what I want it to be and not on my circumstances at that moment. Work in progress!

How about when you guys meet up you just go out with the intention of enjoying yourselves together and take the focus off chatting girls up and make that a secondary objective.

We do essentially . I would say all of the above still holds true and is sound advice.

Also I suspect there will be people reading this who are yet to meet anyone from forum. May be of use.

That's what nine out of every ten non-community lads tell me when I mention the PUA scene. I've tried it. I end up having a great time with the lads and doing a few tipsy approaches. The approach count and quality of results doesn't even come close to when I head out with fellow PUAs with the express purpose of getting laid that night.

Man you are bang on with pretty much everything there. I've experience everything you say in some form or other.

You need a balance between going out with nothing other than pulling on your mind at whatever cost and going out with your mates telling stories getting drunk and not even talking to single girl all night.

I'm going to come out and say it, the Manchester boys on here (alot come out who don't post) need to start making a lot more effort. If you'd judged us a group at our best you would make the assumption we were a group of average lads on a night out who know fuck all about game. At worse you'd think some people had been dragged out the house against their will.

Sometimes we need to go from mates to wings. Last Saturday more than once I had to stop talking to girls I was chatting to and physically bring back a mate for the other girl to talk to because they wouldn't do it off their own back.

Guys we've got great banter and the people I go out with often I consider you all great mates, but I do wish we would do what this places is here for and help each other get some fanny.

good post, I agree with the wing doing better and that messing my own game up. Usually one of us does really well and the other does really poorly on a night, we take it in turns.

Lol good call on the meerkating thing. never though about it before but I do that a LOT

Don't steal your mates girl.
I would say that's the easiest way to annoy me.

Always nice to see someone bumping my threads, thanks!

Yes, going after your mates bird is out of hand!