Get More Girls

CONFIRMATION BIAS. This is how a person can be when they are regarding another person. It could be another culture, or nation, or whatever, but in this case we are interested in when it is a person regarding another person.

The general idea is that they have a bias, and they wish to only confirm this to themselves, and the way they do this is to see only what they want to see. So if they wanted to see someone as a loser they will only notice their failures but not their successes,

The reason why they do this is because they find it difficult to be wrong, or maybe they are selfish and so in order to get what they want which they would otherwise not be entitled to they alter reality to fit them that they can get and serve their selfish needs. It could be other reason, like avoiding an obligation, or avoiding guilt, etc.

It is a bit like PROJECTION, it is altering reality to suit their self. These people are going to be awkward characters, very unreasonable, trying anything to have their way, going to any lengths, makebelieving fantasy is reality, etc. They would lie and cheat, and even believe it. They will twist anything to get what suits them and avoid what doesn't suit them.

It is a problem with them, they are maldeveloped. If you get involved with such a character you can have all kinds of problems. They can be very clever, they can seem normal, sane, etc. They can be believed, which is potentially very dangerous.

SELFISHNESS (narcissism). Selfishness is something we all do, of course, and projection and confirmational bias, and we can be stupid, even if we are not prone to being stupid. These are all human traits, and are healthy, but only healthy when to a certain point, for it is unhealthy when these become abusive and harmful.

It always amazes me that in the workplace or in general society, there are checks and balances, courts, police, solicitors, watchdog bodies, employment law, the law, the endless debate of those whom form the law. But in the family, or personal relationships it has none of this as it is usually never heard or seen, yet clearly these are the same people , humans, who are subjected to the Law in general society, so clearly they get up to the same things in family and personal relationships. So family and personal relationships are naturally going to be a very difficult, to say the least, place to have to deal with.

Selfishness, well it is fairly obvious what it is, but as i have thought about it i have found that it is quite a wide field, and sometimes very subtle. There are things like someone wishing to protect themselves from the awful burden of guilt, say, and in doing this they can go to extreme lengths of selfishness, putting themselves first at whatever cost to anyone else. They just what to get whatever it is they want, their own way, whether it is fair or unfair, moral or immoral, and at any price to anyone else.

Ideally they could just write a script and the whole world would act it out for them, so they could do whatever they wanted, have things perfect to suit their self. But they cannot write such a script, so they use whatever they can use, so they will attempt to manipluate, control, and this can involve emotional blackmail, or lies, or smears, or whatever.

Naturally it is better for such a person to use stealth, to be unseen, unsuspected, unexpected..so they have to keep a 'face' which the world will not notice their real agenda.

Involvement with such a person can be devastating, totally draining. It can be extreme and prolonged bullying, totally upsetting and draining. And the victim is not able to see what is going on, so they just have to keep taking it.

I believe that these people have mal-developed personalities. They are fixated in a stage of infantile development where most of us all left that stuff behind as we got empathy, etc. But they still have infantile traits, and they think that the reason why nobody else does what they do is because everyone is stupid and not clever like them. The truth is that they are mentally ill, but they don't see it that way.

I believe that a person's sexuality, their state of sexual confidence, their comfortablness with sex, is at the very heart of a human's being. Damage to this sense of sex is therefore potentially devastating, and so naturally a person will try to protect their self very much if this seems threatened, so they will be very selfish and go to extreme lengths.

Just to ask a person if they would like to go on a date is a sexual thing, and if that person does not ask well, or if the person asked does not handle the question well, then damage to the sexual self will occur and affect.

This is why it has to be recognized that 'gaming' is not really a game, or if it is then it is a serious game. To protect themselves regarding a perceived assult upon the sexual self they may go into wild imaginations and then believe them imaginations, say, to put the blame away from them. They are in a difficult position and will have to go to great lengths more than anything else because it is sexual. So, fickleness, if someone wishing to protect themselves and pass the blame is able to suddenly 'switch their direction and you not know, then it can be made to look as though you are being out of order. For obvious instance, someone might leave out the fact that they asked you out, and so it makes it look like you are pestering them when you text and call, etc.

I know I am not breaking any new ground here at all; I'm just chatting about it, We live in an age with its own times. It seems to be a time when women are being empowered, which is good, but it may not be done perfectly. It just feels, to me, that the law is unfair, that there is a kind of 'men-bashing' going on. I could be wrong about this, but, for instance, I read in a law text book I happened to come across and thumbed through it, that stalking as a crime now needs only two incidents! and these merely being that a woman merely has to say that she saw you and felt scared. The bar seems set so low that it is impossible for a possible stalking crime not to have taken place, which on investigation would in all typical cases come to nothing, but would give the grounds for investigation, and for you never to know about this, that there could never be the grounds for you to complain that a false allegation has been made. A woman merely has to point a finger and there is no come back. It stinks, to my mind. It is like a witch hunt, to terrorize men into some kind of line, maybe as some kind of way to re-dress the balance between women and men, I don't know. Yet maybe this is the wrong way, maybe it is bad for women and good for men, but bad for equality. All I know is that being a man is not an easy option. It is like with respect, it has to be earned and deserved. To women, welcome to the man's world, if that is what it is. Bust your knuckles when changing the wheel at night on a wet road with jacks that don't work, where you have to use stones from a wall to get the thing off the ground. Men's skin is not made of iron. We are not that different. Our eyes sting from old oil in them, and hurt when rust gets in them. A lot of what a man does is because he has to. It just doesn't seem like heading for equality to me. Women are being empowered, but it is not in a way which wins respect, I feel, not when a woman can make accusations, can tell tales, is listened to, where you are the man and in the wrong because of that, or so it seems. But we are where we are, so be careful. The old adage comes to mind, 'Never tell all you know, lest your friend becomes your foe'.

Of course the internet is spied on, is studied, and files constructed on people and groups, it seems only natural. People should be very careful, and maybe always throw in some red herring searches, for instance, so no real sense can be correctly constructed, done cleverly, making patterns, just so that you have a privacy of a sort, as you may then be monitored but it means nothing, just inaccurate confusion. I don't know, I'm not an authority, it's just my opinion.

As for myself, when all is considered regarding people and their problematic ways, well I have lower expectations in general. It makes me so that I trust in myself, that I conduct myself properly, then I can hold my head up, so to speak. But it is more than this. I conduct myself well in order that I can keep a true and steady inner compass, and can follow this, making life better and less problematic. I try to keep it real, to face whatever it is that needs to be faced. To be able to admit when others are right and I am wrong, to apologize if it is right to do so. To try and be fair, just and wise. And I enjoy this.


The End.


Note: That music video with the clown, where this guy can't pull that bird. Well this is an illustration of how a person's idealized sexual self was threatened, and that is why it affected him so much. I think it is a great idea, because I feel it very much sometimes, like even when I see a beautiful woman, a really beautiful woman go past me, fleetingly, and i know I will never be able to be close to her, such are the circumstances. It is gutting, and can stay with me for weeks. She fancied that comedian guy over him, she regarded him as a stupid boy, and he felt like a stupid boy, and it actually really disturbed him psychologically. This is why I think it was something which had a song written, as it was really very much more powerful to the songwriter, so wrote a song to sort of do some therapy. Clearly they were very affected. Look at it again in this psychological way. https://youtu.be/__-cI_oM_lM (full screen essential).