newbie with anxiety out this weekend

[scorpiolover]

Gents

Im new to all this Pua but it really is of great intrest to me and hopefully one day i will be able to find a lovley girlfriend

so where am i up to so far?

i have signed up here a few months ago but have been really busy with work commitments

anyway i have been trying to go through the rsd blueprint i think im only 25% through it, its a lot to take in

also started to listen to david de angelo double your dating techniques


now im out this weekend around my town for a few beers with a friend and i really would like to approach a few women

this is something i havent tried before and it gives me massive anxiety before i even think of approaching,

all i want to practise is seeing a woman, having the balls to get up to her, and try to have a conversation for 2 mins max then leaving


does anyone know any good approaches or any help with anxiety, i wouldnt approach unless she was on her own as im really shy

so what should i be doing this weekend, how do i get in the right frame of mind, what to say?

any help greatly appreceated

[Y45]

try being genuine...

lines dont really mean shit cause your body language might be saying something completely different.

Owen in one of his old RSD material talks abouts "hi my name is..." as an opener when approaching a girl, i think thats genuine, it sub-communicates a lot, it says your confident enough to introduce yourself, you have self value and you take action...

So something like "hi my name is...." coupled with why your talking to her is an honest way of approaching a girl. an example would be:

Hi my name is [Insert your name here] ...i noticed you from over there and i just had to introduce myself...*Smile*.

she can take it or leave it. No one gets success at every single approach. so prepare yourself and know it.

but most importantly your body language needs to be projecting Alpha. straight posture and strong eye contact is a good start.

jsut my 2 penny's worth hope it helps.


Peace
Y45

[Rabbid]

I wouldn't set yourself any target of 2 minutes then leave, if its going ok stay in there until you fuck it up. It's more about knowing where you fucked up and addressing that afterwards.

[Rabbid]

I agree with the direct genuine stuff though as Y45 said. Most guys don't approach, so your success will improve 100x just by that fact lol

[Y45]

another point to mention is your mindset...(and im telling myself this as well as teling you)

have a clear goal, dont be too ambitious. i.e. "i want to make her smile, that is my goal". You could do that for the first few approaches and then maybe take it to the next step..."now i want to introduce more kino and also make her laugh"...and just keep building it up until you reach your actual goal which could be a number of things depending on your overall reason for getting in the "game".

most importantly dont put too much pressure on yourself. shes just another person! shes not going to make you look like a dick for telling her you thought she seemed nice! why would she? and the off chance she does, do you really want that kind of girl in your life?

we all get AA and the 3 second rule does work but just go out, meet your mate and enjoy yourself. if you see someone you like introduce yourself and see what happens.

Peace
Y45

[Volta]

Hey man, just relax, if you're concentrating on "finding a lovely girlfriend" I think you might end up putting too much pressure on yourself to perform to every girl you speak to y'know? Investing a little too much?
My advice would be to focus on having a good time, and speaking to whoever you want because you could have a good time with them, if you end up with a girlfriend, BONUS, if not, at least you had a good night!
Best of luck to you man, looking forward to the field report!

Jack a.k.a. Volta

[Boscher]

Awww, it wasn't so many moons ago that I was as shy and petrified as that. I can really relate. It's really cute watching newbie's make their first approaches. It's also refreshing to see someone on this forum searching for a girlfriend rather than just more and more anonymous sex. How old are you buddy?

Anyhow, I wouldn't seek a magical line or scheme. Just stroll over and say "Hi" with a smile on your face, then just attempt to relax and be your cheeky funny self that everyone has within them once comfortable. When I'm stuck for words (which does can happen when I'm struck with a megahot girl), I usually just take the piss a little in a fun way, much like how you would rip on your best mate. She'll defend herself, then you engage banter. There's really no science behind most of it, nor is it worth overcomplicating.

Just as an example of how goofy, meaningless and ridiculous you can be with your conversations. I went up to a girl on Saturday, and just stood next to her and put my fingernail between my front teeth. When she finally got weirded out and asked wtf I was doing, I said "You've got food between your front teeth, it's kinda gross". She freaked out and scrambled for her mirror, dropping her stuff on the floor. Now, obviously she didn't have anything between her teeth, hot girls are meticulous with their appearance. She was naturally pissed off and hit me over the head, but because I was laughing about it, we both found it hilarious that she reacting so crazily. Queue, the rest of the night me doing impressions of her spazzing around on the floor picking up her stuff and mimicking her being paranoid about checking her teeth. Don't take anything too seriously, two things generally happen, you'll either get hurt or she will liken you to a business sales proposition.

If you're just starting out, you might bomb more than you win, but stick at it, ultimately it is worth enduring. Don't over commit on the booze in an effort to suppress the anxiety, after 3-4 it will just make you sloppy generally if you are not accustomed to going out.

[Rabbid]

Also don't get to into drinking to much, it won't help you. Just a couple at most.

You might find unless your mates are in on the game they wont help and just make things harder by getting in the way or teasing you if you get rejected. Nothing you can do about that so just ignore anything they say / do and don't take it personally.

[scorpiolover]

Thanks Guys

Some class comments and help there, im 37 years old and been single for over two years, but never really had a proper relationship,
im no problem at all when im with the guys always being the joker in the pack and recently joining kickboxing and ju jitsu with new guys isnt a problem for me

but the thought of approaching women is a biggie for me, thats why i think its best not to be outcome dependant at all ( i.e trying to hook up or getting her number )

that way i can best relax just try to approach and have a little conversation from there, the more i can do this hopefully the eisier it will get and the more options i can try out