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Stopping yourself from going soft... -
26-11-2011, 08:50 PM
Hi all!
I wouldn't by any means call myself a complete beginner....I certainly have had some success
I have recently realised what made it easier was that if I was completely honest, I wasn't that into the girls I was seeing....not quite good looking, not the best body etc etc so it became easier to stand back, or just walk away and move to the next
But now I have found a girl who I am crazy about, very pretty, amazing body, we get along (like best friends) really well. My question is, does one carry on with the initial mindset, i.e. the negs, not calling for a day or two....or should things change at all.
I doubt I would, but don't want to start on the slippery slope of becoming that wimpy, ''yes miss, how many miss'' guy who is unattractive!
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26-11-2011, 08:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by cha
Hi all!
I wouldn't by any means call myself a complete beginner....I certainly have had some success
I have recently realised what made it easier was that if I was completely honest, I wasn't that into the girls I was seeing....not quite good looking, not the best body etc etc so it became easier to stand back, or just walk away and move to the next
But now I have found a girl who I am crazy about, very pretty, amazing body, we get along (like best friends) really well. My question is, does one carry on with the initial mindset, i.e. the negs, not calling for a day or two....or should things change at all.
I doubt I would, but don't want to start on the slippery slope of becoming that wimpy, ''yes miss, how many miss'' guy who is unattractive!
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ur half right,
stop calling them negs.
just make sure u make the descisions, be a man, dont take shit from her... but be affectionate... but only sometimes..
dont be a sopball... and dont tell her how amazin she is every 2 mins
just treat her like shes 1 of ur mates
* Insert Funny Tag Line *
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26-11-2011, 10:20 PM
As usual Phil is half right. Women are compliment junkies. Junkies will do anything to keep the smack coming. Compliment junkies are no different. This is the reason why women get nose jobs and breast implants. The mere fact that you are even asking her opinion on anything at all will thrill most women to death. No matter how sophisticated or liberated they are, nearly all women crave male approval like a drug. Every time you agree with one of their bovine opinions it's like throwing their fuzzy feline-like brains another ball of cat-nip.
Investing all you emotional, mental and physical ability into a single relationship is just as stupid as investing your life savings into a high risk stock. On the other hand, if you won every time you played a fruit machine, the fun would evaporate because it would eventually just be a job. You would eventually lose interest and move on to another game.
Think of it in the terms you would if you were training a dog. In the beginning, when trying to get Rover to do as you say, you give him a treat every time he does something then, after he's learned the trick, you don't give him a treat every single time you get him to show off the trick. After he knows how to do it, you only reward him every once in a while, just to remind him that if he keeps doing everything just the way you like it then every once in a while, there will be a reward. Every once in a while.
This is the way you have to treat women. Stagger those compliments. One day give her a few. Then the next day only give her one. Be sure to skip a day, or even three or four before giving her another. Too many compliments, given too often becomes a routine. They become expected. Trust me, you will be resented if you keep it up because it will make you seem like a phony. Constant compliments take all the fun out of the game. Women know deep down that flattery is fake, but they both want to believe, and also, if you're willing to make a compliment once in a while, it shows that you're paying attention and that you care enough to try and consider her feelings. This is the crux of the matter.
Be yourself. Be a man and be proud of it.
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26-11-2011, 10:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Knave
As usual Phil is half right.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Knave
Think of it in the terms you would if you were training a dog.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Knave
This is the way you have to treat women
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ye thats defo the other half, find a girl u like then treat her like a dog.
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27-11-2011, 09:02 AM
Ummm so conclusion could be- when in a relationship keep up the things that worked, but maybe slightly toned down?
I haven't, and won't be changing as a person, learnt from that a long time ago, I'm still doing everything I want to, but I genuinely really like this girl and certaintly won't be going after any other girls- not sure quite what you were implying with the investing in one girl comment knave...
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27-11-2011, 09:04 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil
ur half right,
stop calling them negs.
just make sure u make the descisions, be a man, dont take shit from her... but be affectionate... but only sometimes..
dont be a sopball... and dont tell her how amazin she is every 2 mins
just treat her like shes 1 of ur mates
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cool, that's kinda what I was thinking really
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27-11-2011, 03:44 PM
Its about being understanding but I'm talking being understanding when she gets fired, or her mother dies, not playing the role of Mr. Tampax every time her brain starts to leak dribble. Keep in mind, after five days of soaking up leakage, tampons end up in the bin. Sure, listen to them once in a while, but let's remember, the only thing you really want to listen to is the sweet rhythm of her head bouncing off the pillow.
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27-11-2011, 03:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Knave
Its about being understanding but I'm talking being understanding when she gets fired, or her mother dies, not playing the role of Mr. Tampax every time her brain starts to leak dribble. Keep in mind, after five days of soaking up leakage, tampons end up in the bin. Sure, listen to them once in a while, but let's remember, the only thing you really want to listen to is the sweet rhythm of her head bouncing off the pillow.
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really?? so is this how u view friendships then?
u really only wanna know them when it benefits you??
coz ur partner should be ur friend
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27-11-2011, 04:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by cha
Hi all!
I wouldn't by any means call myself a complete beginner....I certainly have had some success
I have recently realised what made it easier was that if I was completely honest, I wasn't that into the girls I was seeing....not quite good looking, not the best body etc etc so it became easier to stand back, or just walk away and move to the next
But now I have found a girl who I am crazy about, very pretty, amazing body, we get along (like best friends) really well. My question is, does one carry on with the initial mindset, i.e. the negs, not calling for a day or two....or should things change at all.
I doubt I would, but don't want to start on the slippery slope of becoming that wimpy, ''yes miss, how many miss'' guy who is unattractive!
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If you already get along like friends, what is the problem?
I assume you've already slept with her a few times.
You have to be yourself or nothing is ever going to work out. You don't need to turn into the guy that gets trampled on.
If you haven't already slept with her or done anything then yes, you need to make yourself seem unavailable which will build things but don't do it just for the sake of it.
If you want to change a particular thing about yourself then by all means go for it but what's the point in becoming a PUA drone or acting in a way that isn't true to yourself?
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29-11-2011, 07:43 PM
Ok cool....well I think this thread has confirmed what I thought
For myself, I've learned from pick-up, that it's not about becoming a different person, but a better version of yourself, I look back at my first long term relationship, and I'm so glad I'm not like that anymore, not just on relationship terms, but as a person in general
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