pfftt

[Phil]

there are those who put others down to keep them feeling superior to others they need an outside source to elevate their own view of themselves

what you really want is to where your own view of yourself is what makes u feel good

and with that feel like your above everyone

because thats how u make u feel

dunno wa the point of tha was

[Volta]

Right there with you man, great shout.

This is true and I've read it in many places online.

But how does one change their head so that they self-validate as opposed to needing external sources, especially after years of growing up in the UK where it is the social norm to seek validation from parents, carers, teachers, friends etc.

Me personally, I think I do need some external validation at the moment, though it is something I am aware of and working on. I've started my own "feel good blog" type thing on Microsoft OneNote that I read daily, full of my favourite quotes and feel good shit reaffirming my awesomeness.

[nareik]

I think you need to decide what your own standards are, and try to meet them, as opposed to trying to meet somebody else's standards. You can still fall short (I often do), but at least you decide whether you have value or not using your own set of standards.

That way external validation is nice, but you don't need it because your own opinion of yourself matters most.

[Darood]

Never compare yourself to other people, If you consider it like a race, there will always be people ahead of you, but you dont know how long ago they started or how hard they trained.

The only person you should be looking to beat is yourself and your own limits. Challenge yourself do things you've never done before. Happiness comes from achievement more than anything.

Nothing beats the feeling of doing something you never thought you could do. Not because thats what everyone is doing but because its what you wanted.