Handling objection
 

Hey PUA

I’m looking for some guidance/feedback in handling a specific objection from a ‘colleague’, that she keeps returning to.

Short background info:
We both work at a large bank on the trading floor among probably 100-150 other people. Our work does not overlap at all. She’s afraid to get slut-shamed and that I would be high-fived by the guys, so I have proposed that the fever people that knows anything, the better. Firm politics approves employee dating. We went back to my place after last friday and had sex.

Objection:
She keeps returning to the point, that we are colleagues and that its a bad idea. I have but laughed it off, said that I heard her, but continued to escalate.

I could use your inputs. Is it the right approach? Do you have any experience in the matter or a specific response to the objection?

Additionally, she told me that her friend wants to set her up on a date. Is she just trying to test me and make me jealous? Again, I but laughed it off and said that I wasn’t afraid of a little competition.

Last night she texted me how good she was looking, when going out that all of her female friends called dips on her. Is she trying to get my attention?

Best,
Siemprereal

It seems fairly clear she is saying those things to get a reaction. But not from a position of power and somewhat clumsily done too. The high five is for banging a chick, if you were in love they wouldn’t high five. That’s where the slut bit comes in. It’s not the fucking it’s the context. You saying “then let’s keep it secret” can be heard as “well you are a slut and that’s all I’m in for so let’s keep it hush and you can be ashamed in private“.

As you are already sexing and she is trying to get you jealous, this can go anywhere you want it to. One thing that is missing from your post so far is what your interest is here. How to proceed depends entirely on where you want to end up.


Peace,

kowalski

Hey Kowalski.

Appreciate your feedback and you make a good point!

For now, my interest would be to continue dating her a bit. If sex is good and we are having fun, I would not object to becoming more serious.

Should I ignore the objection “we are colleagues” and that stuff that she’s being set up on dates?

Hi Siemprereal!
You are doing great. I am not an experienced PUA, I'm jusy going to give you my thoughts.
It seems that she's into you and she wants to test you congruence. Are you going to stay cool or are you going to become jealous and enter her frame? If you fail her shit tests she will loose interest.
Stay cool, be confident in yourself and continue to laugh at her shit tests or better still stay in control of the frame (ie: when she sends you message about how great she looks you can reply by talking about her personality). If she crosses the line give her an IOD followed by an opportunity for her to make it right.

What are your intentions? Do you want to become official with her or do you prefer to stay in the dark fuck buddy?

Good luck in you game bro!

Hey 99AcTaRuS99

Thank you for feedback... always nice to know if you are on the right path! I’ll keep the congruence tests and frame in mind.

My intentions is definitely to continue dating her... If she turns out to be a cool person, then it could be more serious. Time will show, but I can see the point that she might fit into a slut frame, when I tell her that the fewer people who knows, the better - honestly, it was meant to keep her confident that I wouldn’t go around telling.

Thx - and you too!

Well, everything that kid wrote was regurgitated nonsense. Congruence, shit tests, frame control, IODs. That’s all bullshit. Girls are not an algorithm nor individual algorithms.

They are attracted to you or they aren’t.
Current life situation is a factor.
She’s gonna pretend she loves sucking dick and doesn’t poop and you are gonna pretend you have goals other than pussy and that you don’t get flustered.
You are both gonna get frightened and try to hurt each other.

She’s attracted to you. She’s worried about the current life situation. She is scared and is trying to hurt you so she can see if you feel it. If you want her to be more in love with you, call the whole thing out. It won’t stop though, it’ll just come from a different angle next time.


Peace,

kowalski

Hi Kowalski!
Nice to hear another point of view. I got all my nonsense from books ("The rational male", "The Game" and "The mystery method") and so far my little experience has confirmed these nonsense. Yes, women shit test us in various ways. It is pretty much the same thing you said in your first reply.

Yes, those books are mostly nonsense. Your experience has not confirmed what they say. Women don't shit test. It's not the same thing I said. What you wrote didn't even make sense.


Peace,

kowalski

Lol, I sens some agressivity man. My experience is my experience, you cannot say anything about it. Those books were written by smart people and they have ideas in common.
Peace man!

It’s impossible to sense aggresivity, which is not a word, over text. You didn't sense anything. What a retarded thing to say. I am aggressive, that's clear to anyone who can read. Your whole comment down to the parody sign off is passive aggressive. That's gross and pathetic even when girls and gays do it. Wouldn't you rather just be aggressive...or not.

I can say things about your experience, there are whole fields of research dedicated to studying things about others experiences. Furthermore, people literally come here to ask us to tell them things about their experiences, that’s what the forum is, you dumbass.

The people who wrote those books are not that smart, and they say the same things because they were literally copying each other’s homework. But they didn’t copy off anyone who is going to pass the course.


Peace,

kowalski