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Default harsh rejection .... it hurts - 01-04-2019, 08:09 PM

So it was a nice sunny day last Thursday so I decided to go for a walk on my lunch break.

I saw a beautiful, elegant looking girl about to cross the road next to me. As soon as we crossed the road I managed to find the courage to approach, it was on the lines of:

"excuse me.... i just want to say i think you look nice today".... or something like that.... i got a mumbled "thanks" back..

Whilst i felt uncomfortable i tried to chat to her whilst walking so asked "what are you up to"... she said she was working..... so i asked "so what do you do"

... and wow... a very cold reaction . She basically said "i don't know you so i don't really want to talk to you". Really rude and she looked annoyed that i complimented / approached.

I was a bit shocked as not had that kind of reaction before, and I just said something like "ok i was only trying to be friendly, but that's fine, have a good day".

In honesty she was the hottest girl I've approached in the day time yet (am a beginner)... but just because if girls are very hot, i wouldn;t expect a reaction so bad. Now i feel quite hurt and its made me even more scared to approach other women..... like today I wanted to approach a girl in the supermarket, but couldn't begin to do it cuz of what happened last week.

Guys, is this a normal part of approaching? or do these kind of rejections happen often or just on rare occasions. Is there anything you think I couldv'e done better? Any ideas on how to feel better?

Thanks in advance.
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(#2)
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HaveACuppaTea's Avatar
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Default 01-04-2019, 09:28 PM

That's daygame! Get used to the rejections. Firstly, give yourself credit, you faced your fear and went over and approached her, daygame is hard, that's why most guys don't do it. You have to crush your ego and in time you won't care about the rejections. Most importantly, learn to enjoy talking to beautiful women, regardless of the outcome. Judging by what you said happened, it seemed a little uncalibrated. You need to learn to become comfortable in the uncomfortableness, and you can only do that through a lot more practice. I would direct you to Tom Torero's Beginner's Guide to Daygame on Youtube, that will give you some structure to get started with. And to give you an idea of the kind of work you may have to put in, Nick Krauser (A well known daygamer) had to do around 1000 approaches before he got laid from a daygame approach.
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dan300's Avatar
MASTER PUA
 
Default 01-04-2019, 10:51 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by kerplunk View Post

Whilst i felt uncomfortable i tried to chat to her whilst walking so asked "what are you up to"... she said she was working..... so i asked "so what do you do"

... and wow... a very cold reaction . She basically said "i don't know you so i don't really want to talk to you". Really rude and she looked annoyed that i complimented / approached.
This made me giggle a little. Let me tell you why in the most simple way possible..

Would you think it was a little strange if a person you don't know came up to you in the street and was like..

"Who are you? What do you do? Where are you from? What's your name? Where are you going? Are you a student? What do you study? Do you like it here?

I know you didn't ask all these, but this is commonly what happens and yes, I'm guilty of having done this too.

Until I long ago had a realisation that nobody wants to be bombarded with questions from a person they don't even know.

It's easy to get carried away in the asking questions thing because you're nervous and excited, but simply turning questions into statements would be a good place to start.


If it doesn't evolve me it doesn't involve me
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Default 02-04-2019, 08:37 PM

thanks for your comments guys and i take it on board.... i am realising that you have to learn to toughen up a bit when it comes to rejections and not take it personally. i do understand what you say about making statements rather than questions, but in the moment i just lost my mind didn't know what to say... so maybe saying something like "you look like a solicitor?" might have been better?? this is sooo difficult but i hope it's something i can eventually crack !
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New User
 
Default 07-04-2019, 12:32 AM

I think they're known as questions of doom.
Sometimes, the situation just isn't right for the girl to stop, not every approach is going to end well. That's the excitement of it. If you get back on the horse, keep approaching, get some number closes, or at least positive feedback, it will boost your confidence again.
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