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Default I'm back at square one - 26-01-2019, 04:11 AM

2 weeks ago I finally got a tinder match that continued after 4 messages and wasn't the bullshit one word answers. After slowly finding out she lived quite close I asked her out, and for the first time in my life, she accepted. I foolishly set the date the day after, not giving myself much prep (I usually need at least a week to process shit).

The day of the date came (yesterday) and I chickened out. First ever first date and pretty much blew it. I was literally shitting bricks. I couldn't sleep to start with, then when I finally woke up and saw it was in a few hours, reality hit me. I felt physically ill (feeling of drowning and that I could puke at any minute) and couldn't get out of bed, and ended up texting her to reschedule due to illness, feeling absolute failure in the process.

I'm trying to learn from what people have said here before about dating strangers as well as getting in there early (2 weeks is better than months), but how is that possible when I can't meet them? Does anyone have any advice (other than "Spot being a pussy!")?

Since joining here I spend far less time on the computer regularly, socialise with women at work (all in relationships), use dating apps and started to go the gym. I've also made jumps in trying to combat anxiety by forcing myself to go to social events and even planned a trip abroad with strangers (scouts), but it feels that with all this I'm back at square one.

(Note: My main intentions first and foremost aren't to get laid, I mean that would be fun, but I want to get a girlfriend, something I think is a reasonable enough goal. The girl in question, other than sounding interesting, is nothing special other than being Asian, and it seems like this is hers too.)

Last edited by ephemeris; 26-01-2019 at 04:37 AM.
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Jaz's Avatar
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Default 28-01-2019, 04:18 PM

You've answered your own question.
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Default 08-02-2019, 12:38 PM

You get a girlfriend by getting sex first then being friends. If you do it the other way around you'll risk getting friendzoned

Try cold approach doesn't need to be sexual just vibing with strangers then progress from there
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Default 08-02-2019, 03:25 PM

You just need a good wingman or someone to motivate and advice you.
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