What with a current gap in the exam timetable, I thought I'd fill you guys in on my activity over Easter. I know in particular Hustler will be keen to hear how I got on, as perhaps will Kowalski who offered some advice on certain matters.

Firstly, some backstory. Remember this?

http://www.puaforum.co.uk/field-repo...ld-report.html

That girl has been shamelessly fancying me since that night, something she left in no doubt by sending me some lovely nudie pictures of herself over the second term (January - March). That was blatantly going to happen then, something I discussed with Hustler a couple of weeks before I descended back into the Seventh Circle of Hell that is my hometown. Admittedly, the lass is a bit of a local bike, but fuck that, Blanca had a dry spell that needed watering!

Since she works during the week and I was living at home with the parentals (great for having your meals cooked and washing done...not so great for your sex life), the only opportunity we'd get would be if one of us got a free house over the weekends. That took 3 weeks, when my folks fooked off on holiday for a long weekend. Relieved, I text her saying "I get back from Hull [visiting a friend] about 4ish, pop over just after tea?"

She didn't reply for a good hour or so, during which time me and my mate joked that she was on her period or something and didn't want sex....! Sometimes the irony is too much, even for me. What made it even worse was that she was about 3 days early. That meant we'd have to wait at least another week...

Frustrated after the following weekend looked no more promising, the pair of us decided to just meet up for a drink and a chat, and (after many false hopes free-house-wise) just give up on our little plan to hide the sausage.

We went out for a drink, and I was in the zone. Firing on all cylinders, and then some. Everything I said made her laugh or turned her on, and before long
she asked casually if I fancied going for a drive.

So drive we did, right out past her village and to the canal towpath, about 5 miles out of town. It was there we happened upon a picnic bench, and...I think you can guess what happened. Interestingly, it was only for the briefest instant, bare-assed and ploughing a naked blonde girl on a bench in the glare of the moon, that I thought it might've been a slight error of judgement to partake in such whimsical activity. The gods of irony were smiling on me that day, however, and we went uninterrupted.

They didn't let up their favour the day after either, with my parents announcing they were going to buy a new car (as you do) and that they were buggering off to Motorpoint for a couple of hours. Cue some more sex.

Sadly, I didn't get to take her up the arse, and K's excellent advice remains (for the moment at least) unused, which is a shame. Obviously by the canal wasn't the right time or place, but we could've done it the next day despite the short time constraint.

I wasn't going to post this FR, mostly for the reason that shagging some skank in Grantham isn't exactly an achievement. But I did for several reasons. Firstly to have a bit of a boast about shagging a girl in public for the first time, second to let Hustler know what happened, since I won't be seeing him (or any of the Bristol crew) for the next couple of weeks, and also to thank Kowalski for his help. Oh and CO, you get a mention for telling me that anal is when you stick it up a girls ass.

Anywho, for anyone wondering exactly why I took so long to return to Bristol, this was one of the reasons. My exams finish on the 18th at midday, so by 1pm I shall be drunk and by 1am I shall be dead. However, in some capacity I will be out and about thereafter.

Bollocks, I've just massively failed at putting this in the correct section. Jaz? Little help?

Nice one. Sex in public/outdoor spaces with the chance of getting caught is ace!

Haha! Certainly something to tell the grandkids!

And K, my post title was a play on the fact that she is a bit of a local bike, cleverly mated with the phrase "it was like shagging a bike" in reference to shagging a particularly thin (almost to the point of malnutrition) girl.

Nice work my friend!