PUA Forums - The UK's Leading Pick-up Artist Forum

PUA Forums - The UK's Leading Pick-up Artist Forum (https://www.puaforums.co.uk/)
-   General Chat (https://www.puaforums.co.uk/general-chat/)
-   -   How to get into LTR with a fuck buddy who is also my flatmate?! (https://www.puaforums.co.uk/general-chat/10471-how-get-into-ltr-fuck-buddy-who-also-my-flatmate.html)

ReincePriebus 09-11-2012 09:36 AM

How to get into LTR with a fuck buddy who is also my flatmate?!
 
Hi guys,
Basically, moved to university about six weeks ago, fucked my flatmate twice in the first two weeks, nearly got friend zoned, learned about PUA and starting doing some basics (DHVing, kino, being less available, negging) and hooked up with her again last week when we were a lot less drunk than the first few times. Besides the hooking up, we have been hanging out so much and have become such good friends that I can't deny any longer she is exactly what I want in an LTR.
However, even though I have not said explicitly that is what I want, she has indicated that she can't be in a relationship right now. We had a text conversation in which she basically said she really doesn't want me to think she is a slut, wishes she didn't have to sleep around to deal with her self esteem problem but if she does she is relieved when it's me she wakes up with, and that I'm the 'lesser evil' but she is still doing it for the wrong reasons. It's not like she is sleeping around that much though, she has only had one other random hookup since we got here and has also had sex with another fuck buddy type guy a few times (But interestingly not for a while now). Keep in mind this is the first term of university!
Thing is, we do not have a just friends type relationship! We have watched porn together, and spend the evenings in my room sometimes watching TV, listening to music, all the while cuddling, playfighting, etc. (I have made sure this doesn't happen too often, can't be that available, plus I always keep the sexual tension going when this does.) Plus we have joked a lot about next time we hook up, and even all joking aside I am pretty confident it will happen in the next few times we get drunk together. Basically everyone else in our flat/block thinks we are getting together, it's that kind of thing.
So has anyone got any ideas how am I meant to get her to start hooking up with me when we are sober, and stop having sex with other people, the only two things stopping what we have now from being a full blown relationship? It's so hard because whatever happens I have to live with her for a year at least! I've got oneitis bad but this time it must mean something, every other time I have got over it as soon as I have got with another girl but that hasn't worked this time... tried twice.

ReincePriebus 09-11-2012 10:53 AM

I think I put it the wrong way when I said 'get her to hook up with me sober'. Firstly I am definitely in her league physically. I meant more like good ways to initiate, bearing in mind if I get rejected I am living with her.

And by get her to stop hooking up with other people I meant be exclusive with me, she's not cheating we aren't together.

But I do get your point. She's not the most stable person even though when we are just talking and hanging out she does seem like it.
A total disaster is not unlikely. But the opposite of a total disaster is not unlikely either... that's the problem here.

I think I'm going to keep my distance for a while, keep my alpha frame going with her, and rack up a few more notches. She might just fall into my arms, haven't played the jealousy card yet.

Optic 09-11-2012 01:24 PM

You need to play the jealousy card sooner rather than later, you haven't mentioned you having anyone else in your bed only her. Why would she want to change or escalate with you if she already knows what you can give her. She seems happy to take you when it suits her and this should be the other way round. If I were you, bed someone hotter quickly, let her know what she is missing.

Spike 09-11-2012 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Optic (Post 67979)
You need to play the jealousy card sooner rather than later, you haven't mentioned you having anyone else in your bed only her. Why would she want to change or escalate with you if she already knows what you can give her. She seems happy to take you when it suits her and this should be the other way round. If I were you, bed someone hotter quickly, let her know what she is missing.

Yes follow this advice.
And don't rub it in her face about it to make her jealous. That is weak.
Instead, just be neutral and natural. Play it cool. Offer a 3-way!

Optic 09-11-2012 04:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spike (Post 67980)
Offer a 3-way!

:clapclap: You would be surprised how many women want to try this. A prime example is one I had in January. Wrote about it on my blog. Not sure the rules of sharing links on here so google secretdiaryofaswinger human centipede the top result will take you directly to the post on my blog.

Phil 10-11-2012 08:43 AM

Anyone asking how to initiate a LTR is destined for doom

daleinthedark 10-11-2012 08:55 AM

I have steadily gained the opinion that I would like a girl to sleep with me because she likes me, not some inauthentic routine I pulled talking about something I do not care about.

the same goes that I wouldnt want to enter a relationship that starts on the foot of game and game-playing...

Do what K said, get your cock out...

chillem 10-11-2012 09:42 AM

...and put it in her mouth

SmileyK 11-11-2012 08:42 PM

I miss those naive university days.....


All times are GMT. The time now is 02:41 PM.

Pick-Up Artist Forum UK
Copyright © 2024