Okay, I need to confess something. I am fat. I used to be really slim, toned and fairly muscular. And I felt awesome.

And for some reason, (probably at the time of meeting my current girlfriend), I have put on like 3 stone, now weighing 14 stone, and have grown quite the belly.

I always try to hide it, by wearing big and baggy clothes. But many of my nice clothes have stopped fitting me, and it is generally getting me down in life. I try to tense up a lot at work, so I don't look fat all the time.

I feel like I need help. I have a gym membership. I go alone, and don't know anyone who I can go with. I start going for a week, or 2, or sometimes even 3, but then, I just stop. I will be at work, and just feel like "meh, i cant be arsed to go to the gym after!" Then I stop for a few weeks. I've been like it a while now.

Also, I feel like I can't fix my diet. I feel so limited in what I can eat. I don't like: Salad, vegetables, fish like tuna, nuts other than peanuts. I just struggle to figure out what I can eat on my work lunch. Also, when I'm at college on Wednesdays, I just eat crap due to the lack of canteen (cob van comes), and just get loaded on fizzy pop bottles all day, which is terrible.

I feel like I'm addicted to fizzy drinks (like, I can't go a week without them). What I tend to do is have some breakfast, then not eat until I finish work at 4pm, cos I can't really stomach a dinner.

I want to burn away the stomach fat, and get a 6 pack eventually. I have read a billion articles on slimming, losing fat, building muscle, different variations, and I just really don't have any motivation. I want to start looking good again.

I also want to note: I hate running, concrete or the treadmill, as I get really bad back ache after like half a mile. For this reason, I've been going on the cross trainer (trying to do interval training on it). I also try and do some all body weight training.

I know its easy to say "just get up and go to the gym", but sometimes I just persuade myself not to go. Its frustrating. Anyways, if you're still reading this, any help or feedback will be appreciated, good or bad. I feel like this is a big stepping stone in the way of me being awesome.

Thanks
Dan

Heck this is a confession

Nothing anyone can say to you will help unless you choose to take action.
You dont need to go hardcore straight away--its best you dont or you wont stick to it.

Start by changing your lunches - go to the supermarket, get packets of Decent Ham, Beef and a bag of Salad, some onion or pickles and tomatos.
Wholemeal Bread --
and a pack of small bottles of Water.

there you go thats your lunches sorted! --it IS that simple.

Have you thought about joining BMF - British Military Fitness
that will get you outside/meeting men and women and fit

start with that and you are well on your way.

Once it becomes a habit you WILL feel good about yourself

Take up kung fu or dancing or something that distracts your mind while you exercise. Makes it a lot easier to do. Dont use weight as an excuse not to be awesome in field, you've got four limbs, two eyes, a dick, a brain, the ability to talk, you're not dead. All these things and a lot more give u replication value. Actually, fuck it all you need is a dick, balls and to not be dead and an insane level of confidence in yourself and you'll get shit loads of women. End of.

Get some sardines in tomatoe sauce on toast tooting for lunch. Cheap and f*cking tasty! Also I'd imagine you've got an uphill struggle to be remotely healthy if you reject all veg. It doesn't always have to be about joining the gym. Cycle to work.

Yeah I know I can be awesome regardless of my weight, but it's generally making me feel shitty about myself anyways, so I have to sort it out.

I will get some wholemeal bread and ham and chicken, its just the salad I don't like. I don't like pickles, tomatoes, or onions.

I will look at BMF..

I want to WANT to go to the gym. I do deep down, but some stupid voice in my head convinces me that "chillin out at home" will be much better, and it's pissin me off.

I do buy juices, like raspberry and cranberry, but then I still go and buy a can of coke at lunch or something.

I'd like to take up a martial art, but I can't afford that and the gym, so I would have to cancel the gym. I'd go with friends, but all my closest friends, live like 10 - 20 mile away and can't drive.

Thanks for feedback

Edit: Just saw Jaz and Nova response..

I don't mind how heavy I am, I just want to look good, and at the moment, you could pinch a few inches.

That sounds like a simple enough diet Jaz, I will do that.

nova.. I don't like any fish, it just makes me heave. And yeah, it sucks that I hate all veg, but I have tried and tried over and over again, but it just makes me puke. Its shit really.

Also, I have just bought a bike to cycle to work, as its only 3 miles.

I dont give a shit-- i dont like salad either
JUST EAT IT you will learn to like it.

An idea of my typical diet....

Wake Up,
Hit Work (5 mins away)
Coffee, Banana
20 mins later Protein Drink in Milk
Hour After Oat So simple with some Honey on.


Lunch
Defrosted a Chilli i had made
- Lean Beef, Peppers, Onion, TOmatos, Kidney Beans and some Pasta

Afternoon
Protein Drink


Home
Pre-Gym i`ll probably drop a Banana
Post Gym - Recovery Protein Drink


Late Evening Meal
Pork Chops, Spuds some Veg

Pre Bed
Protein Drink

General Drinks -- Ribenna, Water, few Coffees

Its a pretty healthy diet-- but its just normal for me and its not ahrd work to keep it up at all.

Sure weekends or the odd evening i`ll go out for a meal and have whatever, still generally stay away from stodge though

I disagree though. I have tried to eat peppers and onions and stuff like that, and I literally throw up (And I don't normally puke unless I want to), but this stuff just seriously makes me heave it all back out.

I looked at getting protein for protein drinks, but somebody told me you get through like a tub a month (and the tub was like £30), so that makes my healthy eating rocket from £30 for the gym, to £60 (Please correct me if this is wrong, as I would love to get some protein powder cheaper).

I like pasta, but only hot pasta, which kinda screws up having pasta for lunch for me. I am trying not to find excuses for things, but a lot of foods generally make me puke.

I really do want to fix my diet.

This is golden advice, golden. Pay attention to it, Jaz has laid out the athlete's method for you. It's all about blood sugar regulation, insulin sensitivity and ketosis. Fascinating field I'm currently geeking out learning all about for the same reasons as you. All I'd add is get to bed early, build up the exercise slowly over weeks and months so you don't burn out or lose the energy to keep it up. Oh and you may get withdrawal headaches from the artificial drinks detox as you'll no longer be on caffeine or sugar, just knowing this may happen and will only last a couple days at most, will help you bear with it until it subsides and your mood bounces back. Good luck!

PS

It's time to look at recipes that take the edge of your fear of veg. There's plenty of combinations with veg and sauces that are healthy. Like Jaz said, joining the gym is irrelevant. You're on the right path cycling to work though.

Thanks PostScript, I'm guna print out that advice and live by it.

I see all over the net talking about what foods to eat, but I just seem to find it harder cos I don't like most foods that are healthy.

Only reasons I goto the gym is because it hurts my back when I go jogging, to an extent that I literally have to stop (I use cross trainer instead at gym), and cos they have lots of weights so I can do some weight training as well..

And yeah I always notice it quite badly when I go without fizzy drinks for abit..

Edit:

I see your point Jaz, but I think there is a difference between not enjoying a meal, and not being able to swallow it because I heave and throw up everywhere.

I generally don't have a strong gag reflex, but eating the foods I really don't like just make me puke. I wish it didn't, but it does

You are right though, I haven't been really committed, and I probably would try harder with everything if I knew I was going to die. I will take a look at some recepies to make these foods possibly be swallow-able.

Thanks