Inside my head

[Jamm]

Out about a week ago with max and a couple of non-pua buddies and was really struggling in this loud nighclub/bar.

Started the night really well, got a drink bought for me the first place we walk into just by being cheeky and fun - saying to the girl on my left ' i'll have a san miguel with lime' this made me laugh and she bought it for me, wish i'd asked for a drink i could actually finish though - yuk. Chat to some other birds and give them the drink i got bought for me.

We move on to bar 2 and do loads of imitation game shit and then max shows up and we dare him to approach a group of girls on the dance floor which to his credit he does, however were super 'state-ified' and he's just shown up and is on a much lower energy level.

Bar 3 - loud ass, obnoxious, fun, break dancing etc etc going off and i just went super in my head. My mates like c'mon me and you will go chat up women and i was so in my head I was 'seeking validation' from them and trying to get something from them. I was putting my hand out for them to hold, then i spin them round which i showed my buddy a while back and he wants me to do, but i just so wasn't feeling it. It was super awkward i don't think i actually spun 1 girl around.

The night turned out pretty well. I felt like shit in that bar and was like screw it just keep approaching! I went back to talk to this one girl and she was laughing going 'i've seen you talk to every girl in here'. And i had a good laugh with one group.

Anywho's me and max arn't feeling it so i say lets go to a bar we're more familiar with and get in state and have fun etc which we do - max pulls and i end up taking this girl back to hers (she's fucking wasted and passes out on me on the sofa - i get her a blanket and pillow and leave.)

I wanted to write this because I was just thinking about it and noticed in that bar how i was being - i wanted the girls to make me feel better even though I felt shitty. And all that law of state transference stuff in rsd - i felt like shit so i could have tried that spin move 1000 times and i wouldn't have pulled it off.

I haven't thought about that night till just now, so I wanted to write this to remind myself about it.

Anyways I'm off on the town again with my buddy and that's prob why i'm on here aswell - got the text about 45 mins ago.

Happy nights on the town.

Jamm.

[Jamm]

Yeah i realise this now and that's why i wanted to write about it. At the time i didn't realise it so this post is a reminder to me to bring the party and just have a good time.

After this post i went out and pulled two birds and rocked the exact same club i was struggling in.