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(#521)
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kowalski's Avatar
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Default 13-02-2021, 05:56 AM

The text she would have let slide, as I said..., if you'd reset but you didn't. You doubled down with the "I want you more than anyone else" horror show. The whole time fantasising about giving her an ultimatum like a huge nerd and thinking that's gonna all work out Hollywood style. You were already thinking and behaving like you got dumped and were trying to get your ex back... and anyone with real life experience knows that doesn't work.

"... it's not an impossibility that what I did do has contributed to her withdrawing..."

https://youtu.be/aR4YOwaHNn4

Don't be silly. It's entirely and unquestionably because of those things you did. I said your actions weren't necessarily crazy and that would depend on your motivations... your motivations were crazy though, and to act that way if you wanted to get more out of the relationship is indeed crazy.

I'm shocked by how little you get male/female interaction.


Peace,

kowalski


Drunk driving on a Wednesday

Last edited by kowalski; 13-02-2021 at 06:08 AM.
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(#522)
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dan300's Avatar
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Default 13-02-2021, 06:21 AM

My life experience just didn't cover this particular circumstance. I've never developed such strong feelings for a casual fling before.

Of course I get male to female interaction but on this occasion I mistakenly allowed my emotions to overrule logic. Or maybe I didn't allow it, fuck the dating guru logic. Maybe I just fell in love with her because she's gorgeous and the sex was amazing and I had a connection with her.

Huge lessons have been learned. Not that they'll help me right now.


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(#523)
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Default 13-02-2021, 07:24 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by kowalski View Post
your motivations were crazy though, and to act that way if you wanted to get more out of the relationship is indeed crazy.
My motivation was valid. How I went about it, perhaps not so much.

I think the bottom line is, if she was as into me as I was into her, I wouldn't be in this predicament.

It's a tough pill to swallow, but that seems to be the situation.


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(#524)
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Default 13-02-2021, 12:17 PM

Keep thinking like that and this will definitely happen again.


Peace,

kowalski


Drunk driving on a Wednesday
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(#525)
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Default 13-02-2021, 06:04 PM

That's a horrible thought. The last thing I'd want is to feel like this again.

I need a massive distraction. I want to call on the other girls I see now and again but the reason I want to see them perhaps wouldn't be very honourable. Not when my mind would be elsewhere.

At this point I can't even remember the last time I wasn't thinking about this girl 24/7. She's just there in my head, all the bloody time.


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Last edited by dan300; 13-02-2021 at 10:20 PM.
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(#526)
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Default 17-02-2021, 03:43 PM

Ok. I'll try explain better.

When you are in love and so is the other and you come to say it you just blurt it out while you are in each others arms spinning around and around and around.

And you would say "I love you" not "I think I love you" that's a sign right there... and you would do it to her face not after you just left her because you were too afraid to say it to her face that's another sign... and you wouldn't do it when and in a way where drunkenness could be used as an excuse that's another sign.

Those are all signs that you, at some level, already knew that she wasn't going to be reciprocative in her response. Wanting to do anything like that should scream a warning at you.

I can't state that strongly enough, wanting to say "I think I love you" as opposed to "I love you" means you already know what's up.

It's the same as someone being in the friendzone and knowing they are but the girl is leading them on so there's this weird hope and they say "wouldn't it be crazy if we kissed right now". That's exactly the same. How you would be talking to that person, that's what I'm doing to you because it's appropriate.

You'd be telling that person <that's not how it's done. You don't couch it in "wouldn't it be crazy if..." that's a signal that you already know she will not be into it, the out and the denial is all built in. In fact you don't even talk about kissing at all. "Can I kiss you?" that's also a sign that you know you can't. How you do it is, you kiss her and you kiss her because you already know because you already holding hands and looking into each others eyes and all that.>


That's why it was crazy to do what you did thinking that it could possibly go your way when it is already clear that it won't because you are couching it in "I think..." in not face to face and in being drunk.

If you are ever going to say "I think I love you" don't say it, just as no one should ever say "wouldn't it be crazy if we kissed". You either shut the fuck up and take what you are given or you man the fuck up and say "Listen I love you and I want more out of this but I'm pretty sure you don't and I can't really handle that so we are done here".

Call the other girls. Why not.


Peace,

kowalski


Drunk driving on a Wednesday

Last edited by kowalski; 17-02-2021 at 03:54 PM.
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dan300 (17-02-2021)
(#527)
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Default 17-02-2021, 06:50 PM

Cool, man. I get it.

In my drunken stupor I thought it was harmless but there's maybe deeper shit going on like you've analogised. I believe my stupid drunk face said "I think I love you" because I was worried about going all out and saying "I love you" and it being rejected. Although it's important to note that that was when the sparks from the recent escalation of intensity in our sexual relationship and intimacy were at their peak. My frame of mind then was like "holy shit this girl is actually incredible how the fuck have I not seen her this way before", and this made me do stupid shit like "I think I love you" to let her know I was beginning to think of her as more than casual. It clearly wasn't authentic. Massive lesson learned.

She's still on my mind, but not as much, because I've been talking to this new girl since the weekend, from online, another little blonde MILF. She's very attractive and seems quite fun. We're meeting on Friday evening to have cocktails together. In my place. She'll be staying over.

This is a very much welcome and needed distraction.


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(#528)
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Default 20-02-2021, 08:49 PM

The girl I met last night was down to fuck, and we did it right through to about 7am after getting pissed together.

Something interesting to note about the evening however, was that I found myself comparing her to the other girl I fucked up with. This was new to me, I don't recall ever thinking about someone else whilst I was with a girl, but in a way it kind of makes sense since she had been on my mind so much recently.

Whilst this girl was nice and talkative and bubbly, on a few occasions I couldn't help imagining how much I wanted it to be the other girl sitting there, and how different they are. For me, the other girl oozes more sex appeal than most if not all other girls I've been with, in her persona, mannerisms and even her accent. I shouldn't have took that shit for granted.

Even the sex, whilst it was fine, was nowhere near as good as with the other girl. The girl from last night was even slightly prudish in some respects, although some of that's most likely because she's not long out of an 8 year relationship in which sex had probably become rather mundane. It was fine, but not the best I've ever had (that credit goes to the other girl).

I've got a feeling this could potentially be the case as I go through multiple more girls.

Despite all that, it was still the essential distraction I very much needed.


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(#529)
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Default 21-02-2021, 06:45 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by dan300 View Post
Her box 😅

I'm not one of these people who has a shopping list of traits and stuff a girl needs to have. Either I like her or I don't, and then you get to find out about her as time goes along. Of course, there's certainly types I wouldn't go for, like loudmouth chavs.

She's a sexy blonde MILF with great hair and lovely soft face I like licking. We get on great with zero need to be anything else but ourselves. But we get on best in the bedroom. She's a real match for me; I enjoy talking dirty when I'm having sex with a girl I'm into, and this girl is as open as I am, more so than any other girl I've ever been with. I can really open up and she'll reciprocate. This is in addition to her wanting slapped and choked and all that kinky stuff.

So at the minute I'm in contemplation mode. Do I wife this chick and ditch the other couple of girls I'm enjoying sex with, or do I keep going the way I am and perhaps eventually lose the one I really like to someone else?

I've made such mistakes before, so that's why I need to give this serious thought. Can't be dealing with more self-inflicted heart pain.

Ps. The wife bit is a joke.
Nothing wrong with developing strong feelings for a woman when you date a bunch of people there are always emotions involved and there maybe a time when you feel a good connection to one over others this is normal. Even everyday Daygame approaching there’s emotions involved which is why so many people get flustered and frustrated/give up.

Also making her your girlfriend saves time which you can invest on doing other things. When I started out Daygame journey in 2017 I started to gain momentum late 2018 and I regret not wifing up a woman I met an extremely beautiful well connected Chinese woman who was the first girl ever to ask me to be my boyfriend long story short I panicked , said no as I thought it would be a sign of weakness and she left for someone else 2 months later. Girls always have options and people into them if you think there’s someone who adds a lot of enjoyment and value to you there’s nothing wrong in going in a monogamous relationship with them.

Is she adding to your life more than the other women? Do you feel you can be a strong boyfriend to her and still maintain focus on your own goals and aspirations? A lot of men get stuck in the long term plans with girls without any clear vision of a ltr I think this is really important to focus on. What do you do when you get big success and how you manage yourself during those moments is pivotal. In Pua there’s so many blow outs, flakes , lmrs that guys get flustered once they finally get what they want. I got flustered and missed out big time and I regret that mistake but looking back I’m glad I made relationship mistakes early on in my life and not at the tail end of a marriage 20 years down the line. What is it that you want in your relationships overall’? Have you enjoyed mongomus relationships in the past?
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(#530)
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Default 21-02-2021, 07:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isildur1 View Post
Is she adding to your life more than the other women?

Do you feel you can be a strong boyfriend to her and still maintain focus on your own goals and aspirations?

What is it that you want in your relationships overall?

Have you enjoyed mongomus relationships in the past?
1. In terms of how much I want them, yes

2. Yes

3. Compatibility and incredible sex

4. Yes


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