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Default You can't build attraction. - 12-03-2017, 01:12 PM

People, individually, are attracted to what they are attracted to. That's way outside of your knowledge and control. When someone is attracted to you, they are not attracted to you. They are attracted to your being-for-them, that is to say the collection of feelings and thoughts they have about you. A construct that exists only in their experience. You have no access to that construct. Not knowing it and having no access to it means you can't effect it in any controlled or directed manner.

If you do x to 'build attraction', you have no way of knowing if it will nor if it has. So you should just do x because you want to... or not, if you don't.


Peace,

kowalski


Be authentic

Last edited by kowalski; 12-03-2017 at 01:35 PM.
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Default 12-03-2017, 09:32 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by kowalski View Post
People, individually, are attracted to what they are attracted to. That's way outside of your knowledge and control. When someone is attracted to you, they are not attracted to you. They are attracted to your being-for-them, that is to say the collection of feelings and thoughts they have about you. A construct that exists only in their experience. You have no access to that construct. Not knowing it and having no access to it means you can't effect it in any controlled or directed manner.

If you do x to 'build attraction', you have no way of knowing if it will nor if it has. So you should just do x because you want to... or not, if you don't.


Peace,

kowalski

Suprised you didnt use kowalski's catchphrase 'Be authentic'
Explains it all


Game doesn't just increase traffic to your bedroom,
It changes your life
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Default 12-03-2017, 11:49 PM

i agree with this. there's no point wasting time and energy trying to get a woman into bed if she's just no attracted to you.

the most effective strategy is probably to figure out which ones are attracted first, and then hone skills/practice being authentic to increase success rate with them.

i like that saying, "be authentic", its more to the point than "be yourself". i think alot of people have a genuine problem being authentic though, like as if they're scared about what people might think.
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Default 13-03-2017, 06:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Riff View Post
the most effective strategy is probably to figure out which ones are attracted first
That's easy. You can tell straightaway if a girl likes you from the way she looks at you. You just gotta trust yourself. Next time a girl looks at you and you think - Damn, I think she likes me - go straight over, you'll be kissing her 5 minutes later. Do this a few times and you start to trust that feeling.


Peace,

kowalski


Be authentic
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Default 31-03-2017, 10:26 PM

Not according to old school Mystery method, which apparently worked for someone somewhere.
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Default 23-05-2017, 11:57 PM

As much as I wish you weren't, you're spot on.

The funny thing is, when guys start out they decide to ask a woman (big mistake, I know) and get told "just be yourself" or "just be confident" and they're ironically the two best pieces of advice that anybody could ever fucking give you, if you take them in the right way. But instead most guys go to Googling "how to build attraction" and "how to get ex back" and spend 2-3 years reading books before getting rejected on their first approach and starting a PUA hate blog....
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