Quick note to on 'Kerry' from the above field report.
My initial email to her was so weak 'did you have a good weekend at Butlins'
So I sent a second one (I know breaking all the
PUA rules).
This time I just said some things which I meant.
She replied and said she was surprised when I had tried to kiss her, but she also acknowledged I was chatting her up. Anyway I think there is a potential for us to be friends or maybe I'll just keep in contract with her, and see where things go, she does have a boyfriend.
Anyway back to the new field report:
Thursday 19th July
Met up with Tebbus, Paul & Dustin
So I met Tebbus & Paul (Sugar spin bailed early wasn't feeling well).
Had a lot of anxiety prior to going, this was caused because by the thought I wouldn’t be able to approach and obviously being with
PUA's that is an expectation. This was caused by worrying what other people think of me – again this is protecting my ego, I recognise that.
Went for a bit of a mooch around London then we went to a pub where there was a love struck dating event going on. Queue at the bar was a joke, but it was nice and sunny outside. So got our drinks and headed to the courtyard bit. Two girls were standing behind us and I decided just to start chatting with the old 'are you friendly' comment. One of the girls was wearing glasses and I could tell she was more confident and the other girl seemed to be nervous. I chatted for a bit, didn't really fancy either of them but was a good warm up. When I said I'm going to find my friends there was a pause, almost like they waiting for me to ask for a number. Maybe because it's a dating event they were expecting that. I maybe fucked up here because I had already judged them as being not good enough because they were at a dating event. Again ego driven bull shit I must avoid.
Went to a little pub where Tebbus opened some east European girls with a comment about her glasses. Next went to the Porter house in Covent Garden. I was with Paul and we saw some girls on the left and I thought fuck it I'll open them. They were kind of talking to themselves and I just walked up to one and pushed my shoulder gently into her and as she looked around I said the ‘are you friendly’ comment again. The girl I asked was pretty sexy. There was a good bit of banter and I realised I had just opened my first 6 set!
In these situations I am becoming more relaxed and this enables me to be myself more. For example the girl told me they were there because their work colleague was leaving and I said
'so are you celebrating or commiserating'... Anyway me and Paul got cock blocked by a girl who politely asked us to leave as they were there for their friends leaving do.
Next Paul opened a 2 set, a cute blonde Czech girl and a crazy not so hot Argentine girl. Long story short Paul got cock blocked by Argentine girl and drunken assuie guy.
On the way out I walked over to the cute girl I had spoken to earlier and said 'look do you want to go for a drink sometime' She looked nervous and said 'I have a boyfriend' <pause> 'and he lives with me' then she said 'thanks'. I thought this was sweet, she could have just said ‘no’. Anyway I said 'it's fine, you don't ask you don't get' and said good bye.
Next went to a little bar I was on soda water now. Saw one girl giving me an IOI and didn't do anything but then saw a 3 set at the bar. Walked up to the fitty blonde said 'hello' and waited until she looked at me and acknowledge me and said 'I'm Mark'
She was lovely such a nice girl and turned out to be a lawyer. She was asking me lots of questions and showing interest. I asked what sports she liked, she was into cricket and rugby.
I said I have no idea about those sports, (in the past maybe I'd try and get approval and pretend I liked them). Anyway turned out she's dating someone form the London harlequins. I was asking her how she met him and then she was asking about my love life, it was a nice little chat, I didn't feel like I was ‘gaming her’ in fact I’ve not felt that way about any of girls I’ve spoken too for a while.
Positives
Opened lots of girls and stayed in decent length conversations.
Didn't feel too bothered when girls told me they had boyfriends, I wouldn't mind having some more hot non-girl friends in my life if I'm honest. (edit - there' s the ego again!)
Beginning to realise I am often able to connect with women quite easily if I just talk about the stuff I'm interested in. I feel I've really connected with some girls recently, it just so happens they all had boyfriends. It's only matter of time one will be single!
Goals
Maybe just have two pints and then soda waters, I don't want a beer belly.
Enjoy talking to everyone and show an interest whoever it is and stay present.
Be less judgemental